change my view
The alternative is period shits
If you were a banana slug, the worst thing about having a penis would be getting stuck during sex and having to cooperatively amputate it 127 hours style with your partner, using your 27,000 hair-like teeth to sandpaper it off. That’s how female slugs are made.
If you were a flatworm, the worst thing about having a penis would be either the traumatic insemination or the fact that it’s frequently mutual traumatic insemination.
If you were an echidna, the worst thing about having a penis would be- OH MY GOD IT’S A NIGHTMARE, PUT IT AWAY KNUCKLES!
Encyclopaedic knowledge of various penises
Encyclopeenia
Before encyclopedias it was the best one could hope for
If you were a bee having sex rips it off and kills you
When I used to keep bees I put a drone in a little plastic pot in order to feed to my praying mantis (I’m a monster I know), and whilst I was checking the rest of the hives it must have gotten so hot that it literally explosively ejaculated and died.
Haha that’s crazy, I would uhh hate that! 😅
pog
So this was truly the correct number of sex all along
I remember trying to shit with one of those hormonal erections of my youth and sticking the tip into the ice cold shit-laden water.
Negative a million points out of ten. Horrible experience. Single worst thing I’ve ever had happen to my dick and I once closed it in a drawer and that stung like fire and it hurt to pee after and I still rank that above dipping it in my own shit water.
congrats on the huge dong i guess
Real leaked picture of GrouchyGrouse
do you have a footlong, or was it one of those USamerican toilet bowls that are filled to the brim with water for some reason
Congrats on the massive penis comrade
I know a couple girls who had so much bottom dysphoria pre surgery they struggled to take a shower or walk around alone in their underwear at home. It’s a sad fact of life that the biggest dicks always go to those who want them the least.
I would also argue that the hate (or the weird mix of hate and fetishization) you get when you’re a woman with a penis is a lot worse than the dribble. After all it’s just piss, transmisogyny is a lot worse than piss.
I cast testicular torsion on you. Now you have something to complain about
No matter how much you wiggle and dance,
The last drop always goes down your pants
You gotta squeeze your balls really hard to get those last drops of pee out of them.
Wring them out ideally
This is why we have https://getcalicocutpants.com/ nephew
You gotta give
s’why i got bottom surgery
I…
I don’t have a penis and I’m scared to ask what post-void dribbling is
A little bit of pee remains in the tube between the bladder and freedom
Uhhh drippy faucet after the excitement concludes.
OH GOD WHY DID I ASK
Its when you post a void (black cat) dribbling in they sleep
Actually smegma is but go off king
Smegma is such a non issue if you shower more than once a week.
Idk I used to have a dick and unless I cleaned under that hood daily some dead shit built up. Even by the end of day it was funky.
I’m not gonna rule out that you had an especially smegma-prone dick, which I imagine would suck, but my experience with both mine and other people’s penises is that smegma is a non issue with regular cleaning.
I do grow hair and nails at a rapid pace. Maybe it’s a keratin synthesis thing.
I developed a habit of daily showering due to dick funk. /shrug
The worst is when you have to sit at a too small toilet and it kinda has no choice but to rest under the lip of the seat while you shit. It’s nasty and cold and I hate it. My place has one such too small toilet so I experience this on the regular and it sucks
Just hold it. My home toilet is for people who were 4’2" and I’m 6’5", so I have to deal with this daily lol. Being at home I’m much more comfortable with just letting it ride on the seat though…
But sometimes I gotta piss and shid at the same time
RIP, unless you wanna do some dangerous flesh origami to get everything positioned just right
you know you’re in trouble if the post void dribble is coming out the butt insteaddeleted by creator
“Void your bowels” is like a real sterile and polite way to say go take a shit, think emptying the tanks
If you gaze too long into the void, your wee wee leak a little afterwards
press on your taint
