Hi everybody!
I’d originally planned on having a big effort post, but I’ve had some Bad BrainTM the last couple weeks so that’ll just have to wait until next time.
In the meantime, it’s my 2 year HRT Anniversary! These past couple years have also been the first time I’ve really been in community with other trans folx; I’ve had so many breakthroughs and discoveries of myself that I don’t think would have been possible without that and I can’t be thankful enough.
I hope everybody has a lovely week!
Join our public Matrix server!
https://rentry.co/tracha#tracha-rooms
As a reminder, please do not discuss current struggle sessions in the mega. We want this to be a little oasis for all of us and the best way to do that is not to feed into existing conflict on the site.
Also, be sure to properly give content warnings and put sensitive subjects behind proper spoiler tags. It’s for the mental health of not just your comrades, but yourself as well.
Here is a screenshot of where to find the spoiler button.
spoiler
HELLO THIS IS THE MEGA SIGN UP POST/LIST POST
if you have a preferred week please tell me
meler* (3/23 - 3/29) Shaleesh* (3/30 - 4/5) Carcharodonna* (4/6 - 4/12) GayTuckerCarlson* (4/13 - 4/19) Busgirl (4/20 - 4/26) SwitchyandWitchy* (4/27 - 5/3) Disaster_of_Passion* (5/4 - 5/10) sodium_nitride* (5-11 - 5/17) peanutbuttercupola* (5/18 - 5/24) * after name denotes someone who has posted before and will be skipped by first-time posters
you can go ahead and stick me right back on at the end. thanks!
I guess I haven’t done a mega in a while
Which is crazy cause right now I got the most insane mega lineups possible. Anyone wanna hear about chip manufacturing? Or quantum cryptography? Or maybe even … idk, daoism?
Do the dao of chip manufacturing
peanutbuttercupola* (5/11 - 5/17)
Yall have fallen for my trap
. Been upvoting my posts for a long time …If youre using /tttt/ and youre dysphoric a lot you should stop using /tttt/
If it hurts to touch the hot stove, stop touching the hot stove.
The mtf sub is such a shitshow fuck those mods
Been half wanting to make an effort post explaining the whole situation but just look at tw*tter if you want to see the latest shitshow from the clowns.
Tldr with no posted proof though: one of the mods is a convicted pedophile. Got exposed as such. Head, power mod told her to make a new account and he wanted her back to mod. Mod team is now deleting any posts about this and 10s of millions of people on twitter are reading this fucking story. Head mod is also lying about the situation (including wildly downplaying what she actually did/has been doing).
god I really should just make the effortpost but its a lot fuck me.
Talking to an acquaintance in a social setting.
Them: do I detect you are a comrade?
(Me lowering filter)
Me: oh yeah I’m a communist…
Them: I’m more of a democratic socialist.
(Filter back up 50%)
Me: oh cool haha
Damn I really want to get out and maybe hopefully get a partner. Hopefully this time next year.
Yes do it!!! It took some time to feel comfortable going out to social events and stuff, but now it’s just normal. And we’ve been starting to build up contacts and have people to go do stuff with spontaneously which feels amazing XD
oh oof I see how I said that now. I was mostly meaning moving out on my own. But yea I mean where else am I going to meet a partner. Social events and stuff does seem scary.
Well we hope that works out too. Getting into a supportive environment does wonders.
I wonder if anyone will even have me tbh. Unattractive, autistic, I don’t come across that depressed irl but I know in a relationship that’d be a barrier too. Want someone really bad but never have had someone. Trans woman into women.
Idk I just want someone real bad. And to be out in my own place.
No, uh uh. None of that. The only thing you brought up that’s actually unattractive is that you think you’re unattractive. Even then that’ll attract some people but I don’t trust those that seek out people with low self esteem unless it’s out of shared experience.
I am unattractive though, worse because I’m looking for someone who’s into women. I am not an attractive woman.
Being autistic makes it harder to get into a relationship, it just will. I’ve been flirted with once and kinda freaked out. It makes all social stuff a struggle, new social stuff more so. Being trans and wlw removes a lot of people from wanting to date me. Plus never having been in a relationship before will probably also hurt me. I fear a lot of people don’t want that. I hear a lot of people saying they want someone with experience and who knows how to be in a relationship. And it makes it harder for me, not having that experience.
Depression and my general dissatisfaction with life probably wouldn’t be an issue at first but I do worry about it long term in a relationship. Same with my sex issues. idk I feel like a lot of things are stacked against me getting a partner :/ very sad bc I really want someone.
When in doubt, blame the 5G towers! Mom is already ‘skeptical’ in regards to 5G towers. Who knows? It might work.
Some of my learners were complimenting my style, saying I always dress really well and fashionable. I told them:
“Every time I step outside, no matter what I wear, there are people who want to kill me for how I look. It might as well be a look to die for.”
This is really close to my reasoning, I never leave the house without a good fit. Also is someone is staring at me? It’s because my outfit is cool AF. Not because I’m trans.
Additionally it’s defensive that I look richer and more important than I really am. Like if that’s the line between harassing me that makes someone pause, I’ll take it.
HAPPY 2 YEAR HRT ANNIVERSARY!!
I am going to complain here that, that, so much mental health related groups are so extremely and intensely liberal. I really love to talk with others who are also plurals who may or may not have DID/OSDD and such but gosh I really can’t deal with the awful politics anymore 😵💔 I need a communist plural server like YESTERDAY! UGH AAAAGHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Also just to complain I have been dissociating so much it is impacting my studies AGAIN <:(
but on a positive note i am learning and trying weh
CONGRATS
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY
wtf is going on with DIY suppliers, many of the big ones seem to have gone down in the last few weeks. i hear chud news sources got the spotlight on them recently? i have enough to last maybe a couple more years but this is concerningif it comes to having to buy from darkweb suppliers that only sell on TOR markets ig i know enough to navigate that, but what’s happening rn is concerning
Its very concerning, especially with attacks on adult care on the horizon. I don’t even care about having to buy on TOR and shit, but will there even be those?
Yea I’m super thankful to have gotten a bit more in. Not sure if I should try and get raws in too or what.
diyhrt dot info and diyhrt dot market are good backup resources
Rly bad luck deciding to get diy right when this shit started happening
(everything ive ordered should still be on the way, but its taking way longer than normal)
reddit warned me for anti-British posting so I’m stopping by to say death to the British, may transgender missiles rain down on them
transphobia ig?, mention of suicide and sexual harassment
My mom found my HRT medication a few days ago. Things haven’t been going well.
Normally i take my HRT with me so i have access to it at all times no matter where i am. I kept my usual medication along with some vials in case i was desperate and out of options in my work bag. One day when i was walking my dog, i absentmindedly left my bag at home. When i realized that i shrugged it off and said “nah, it’ll be fine” because my mom makes a big deal about privacy and respecting boundaries. Those don’t apply when you’re 19 and still in the house apparently!
She sat me down and asked me what i was doing with these drugs. I had to explain everything that happened between me and my now ex, how suicidal i was before HRT and why i took it. It was a stressful conversation that ended in me having to tell my mom my partner coerced consent from me several times for their own sexual pleasure. Eventually she said that we’ll “revisit this conversation” after telling me i’m “toying with my hormones” and that it’ll “get me killed”. I’m doing DIY through my own research and checking in w my trans comrades both online and irl, for context.
With the way things are looking i might have to move out, run away, something - anything. I can’t let her keep controlling me and i’m not gonna change that by living with her.
Joy! I’m getting back on HRT! And taking a trip!
spoiler
It’s a good news/bad news situation. I’ve given up hope and I’m moving overseas. I don’t know how long I’ll be able to survive, but I at least want to be away for midterm elections. On the bright side, I’ll be going to a very trans-friendly country and I’ll be able to afford HRT, which is absurdly expensive in my state.
Sending you good vibes, hope you adjust well and everything turns out fine
when chuds refer to disagreeing with the “trans lifestyle” i’m going to assume they’re talking about the choice to use distros like arch and nixos instead of more mainstream ones like ubuntu
transphobia
A bunch of kids were transphobic to me when I walked by a playground yesterday. And I don’t know I just can’t stop thinking about the event in a positive light??? It’s like. I didn’t try to girlmode or anything. I had some beard scruffles and was wearing gender neutral clothes, and somehow they knew I wasn’t a guy? Granted, they used that information in a bad way, but they knew just by looking at me walking by that I wasn’t a guy. Idk it just feels weirdly nice
