I went to an alternative school for a bit, and one of the “behaviors” I would get punished for was not making eye contact. I still don’t feel comfortable with it.
Hell I’m generally fine with eye contact, but if I actually want to pause to put thought into an answer, I will absolutely look away so I can get in my head and think!
I always do this when talking. When listening I can focus on eye contact just fine, but my brain will not let me waste cycles trying to maintain eye contact while thinking through communication with someone.
My eyes always do this and I was diagnosed with ADD as a child after an IQ test. Teachers before always accused me of being dishonest and I got into all sorts of trouble because of it.
I grew up around a lot of pathological liars, and still have two in my life. I detect it so quickly. It’s not like the kind of lying I do, pathological lying is compulsive and sometimes pointless. It has nothing to do with body language, it’s all verbal clues.
I have a really good friend now that I would have written off as a pathological liar. But I had to be around him because we kept getting assigned together. What happened was once he detected that I don’t care about machismo or if he could beat me in a fight, he stopped lying because he was no longer trying to impress me.
It’s a fun subject to talk about regardless. The final panel makes it funny, sure, but I imagine a lot of people like discussing their variety of social quirks with others… and this definitely provides the opportunity.
Alternatively, another social quirk that exists is responding before fully processing something… replying to an email / comic / thread before reading the content completely… THAT is typically a behavior seen in people with ADD.
I have ADD and still do this sometimes verbally. I hate myself for it because it’s so annoying. Ever been around someone that constantly finishes other people’s sentences? Probably ADD.
But have you ever been around someone who constantly finishes other people’s sentences wrong? It’s funny at first but not for long, holy shit it’s annoying. And they do it because they want to move the conversation along, but in reality they are slowing it down by forcing others to repeat themselves, correct, or clarify.
Yeah. For some (this isn’t excusing it but explaining some of it:) the finishing a statement is ‘urgent’ because you unconsciously have trained yourself to handle a fleeting idea immediately or potentially lose it to the noise again. Pre medication I moved to a notepad and as someone spoke I’d just leave response breadcrumbs for when they finished. Worked reasonably well.
A friend/co-worker has a trick he uses that I thought was pretty clever, though it only works if you’re nearsighted: he takes off his glasses so he can’t see your eyes but looks like he’s making eye contact
Then you notice how far apart their eyes are or there’s a zit there or they’ve a faint monobrow and you wonder if they’ve ever considered shaving it and you just missed most of the last five things they said.
I usually pick something on the wall just to the side of their head and then I get too focused on that and then the conversation is over and I have no idea what just happened.
There’s a variety of reasons - some social, some have to do with memory. Brain wiring is weird. When recalling conversations with people I will ‘half insert’ them into the physical space and make eye contact with ‘them’ as I would have in the original conversation. For me it helps with recollection; for the other parties involved I may as well be addressing ghosts.
If their eyes do that, they might be autistic.
Source: am autistic.
ND salesman checking in. Yep, I hate this lie.
I went to an alternative school for a bit, and one of the “behaviors” I would get punished for was not making eye contact. I still don’t feel comfortable with it.
Or socially awkward or anxious
Hell I’m generally fine with eye contact, but if I actually want to pause to put thought into an answer, I will absolutely look away so I can get in my head and think!
I always do this when talking. When listening I can focus on eye contact just fine, but my brain will not let me waste cycles trying to maintain eye contact while thinking through communication with someone.
My eyes always do this and I was diagnosed with ADD as a child after an IQ test. Teachers before always accused me of being dishonest and I got into all sorts of trouble because of it.
I grew up around a lot of pathological liars, and still have two in my life. I detect it so quickly. It’s not like the kind of lying I do, pathological lying is compulsive and sometimes pointless. It has nothing to do with body language, it’s all verbal clues.
I have a really good friend now that I would have written off as a pathological liar. But I had to be around him because we kept getting assigned together. What happened was once he detected that I don’t care about machismo or if he could beat me in a fight, he stopped lying because he was no longer trying to impress me.
a lot of people still read me as dishonest
Try reading to the final panel.
They can’t. There were eyes in that panel, and therefore their eyes looked away.
I did. What I said still applies.
It’s a fun subject to talk about regardless. The final panel makes it funny, sure, but I imagine a lot of people like discussing their variety of social quirks with others… and this definitely provides the opportunity.
Alternatively, another social quirk that exists is responding before fully processing something… replying to an email / comic / thread before reading the content completely… THAT is typically a behavior seen in people with ADD.
I have ADD and still do this sometimes verbally. I hate myself for it because it’s so annoying. Ever been around someone that constantly finishes other people’s sentences? Probably ADD.
But have you ever been around someone who constantly finishes other people’s sentences wrong? It’s funny at first but not for long, holy shit it’s annoying. And they do it because they want to move the conversation along, but in reality they are slowing it down by forcing others to repeat themselves, correct, or clarify.
Yeah. For some (this isn’t excusing it but explaining some of it:) the finishing a statement is ‘urgent’ because you unconsciously have trained yourself to handle a fleeting idea immediately or potentially lose it to the noise again. Pre medication I moved to a notepad and as someone spoke I’d just leave response breadcrumbs for when they finished. Worked reasonably well.
Insightful. I just got diagnosed like four months ago so I’ve got a lot of unmasking and learning to do.
What? This is technically written so it doesn’t apply to him.
Came here to say this. It’s so hard to look at someone in the eyes.
I don’t know where to look! It’s so awkward.
Bridge of their nose
Look at their right eye. If you look at their left it’ll feel like they’re looking over your shoulder. Lol
Bridge of the nose, or just above it.
A friend/co-worker has a trick he uses that I thought was pretty clever, though it only works if you’re nearsighted: he takes off his glasses so he can’t see your eyes but looks like he’s making eye contact
Then you notice how far apart their eyes are or there’s a zit there or they’ve a faint monobrow and you wonder if they’ve ever considered shaving it and you just missed most of the last five things they said.
I usually pick something on the wall just to the side of their head and then I get too focused on that and then the conversation is over and I have no idea what just happened.
And if their arms or legs are crossed, they’re probably feeling cold.
Source: am cold.
It’s actually both.
Allists! Your eyes are not that interesting! They’re boring to look at 10 minutes straight.
Or theres a FUCKING SPIDER ON THE CEILING
Depends. Is it cute?
There’s a variety of reasons - some social, some have to do with memory. Brain wiring is weird. When recalling conversations with people I will ‘half insert’ them into the physical space and make eye contact with ‘them’ as I would have in the original conversation. For me it helps with recollection; for the other parties involved I may as well be addressing ghosts.
Everybody says they’re autistic.
I know, right? I wish everyone could experience what us autism enjoyers live with everyday.
Living with autism is so fun that many of us are or have been depressed for long periods, some even considering suicide.