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The species of plants alive at the time of the extinction event that killed the dinosaurs were the ancestors of today’s house plants. However, most species of extant species of plants that we have bred to be “house plants” did not exist, in current form, at that time. So, I wouldn’t take it personally.
Having said that, if you’re regularly killing houseplants in 2 weeks or less, then you probably need to spend a bit of time learning about how to grow them and whether you can provide the appropriate care for them in your home.
Also, a lot of plants we call impossible to kill are really just plants that can tolerate and barely persist for impressively long periods of time in very poor situations. Even with those, if you want them to live let alone thrive, you still have to give them the right care and environment. And unless you’re already an experienced and successful plant grower or just incredibly lucky, you should spend some time learning about how to grow them or you’re probably going to fail.
You can’t permanently grow a full sun plant in your windowless bathroom without additional work and equipment. You might be able to stick a snake plant in there and ignore it for 3 years, though.
They fail to see the bigger picture. Most plants died during the meteoroid impact. Only the hardiest survived. The impact applied evolutionary pressure. They too are applying evolutionary pressure. So really, they need to keep going until a plant strong enough to survive their lack of care is found.
Probably taking a plant that’s already rather hardy, like a dandelion, would help and not trying to rise a single one, but 100-1000 plants in one attempt, would speed up the progress too.
That’s basically how my yard works.
That’s a weird thought to think about isn’t it.
Perhaps the asteroid wiped out a particularly agreeable vegetable or something and now we have to make do with boring carrots.
I bet they had good drugs.
Mmm… Dino weed…
Kids are conceptually much simpler than houseplants though. You just do exactly the same thing you do to take care of yourself, but at different scales, plus some entertainment. They also let you know when they need something.
Meanwhile, plants: “I guess I’ll just die”
This. Kids and pets will let you know when they’re hungry or thirsty. Plants just slowly wither in the corner without making a fuss.
The only plants of mine that ever survived are very drought tolerant, but my cat is the spoiledest little princess and I love her for it. She gets two breakfasts and two dinners, and treats every day, and she won’t let me forget whenever it’s time for any of them!
Should just come to my house. I think I purchased a magic house because every plant that I have in this house thrives. Doesn’t matter if I water them or not. I’m pretty sure I could probably grow them in pitch black cupboard.
I don’t know why I wrote all this but here’s some house plant advice for those struggling:
POTTING
Don’t pot directly into a hard planter if you can avoid it. Use a plastic pot (with drainage) and put it in the planter. This makes it easier to move, repot, and water.
As for repotting, people often repot too soon. Your plant is more likely to die from the stress than from being too big for the pot. Many plants prefer to be rootbound (monstera, orchids), too. Don’t make huge jumps in pot size when you do.
WATERING
The top of the soil being dry doesn’t mean you need to water it. What matters is if the bottom of the soil is wet. Plants usually prefer the soil to become completely dry between watering. Roots need to “breathe” and keeping the soil wet will make them rot. This kills the plant.
You can get a moisture probe for like $20 but if it’s in plastic, you can tell just by giving it a squeeze. You can also kind of tell by weight. Pick up your plant after you water it and compare it to when it’s dry. You’ll have intuition for it in no time.
LIGHTING
The typically-used lighting requirements are insanely misleading. “Indirect” doesn’t mean you can put it in the corner. It means it can survive an arm’s length away from the window.
Almost all plants (including every single “beginner” plant) will do better directly in front of a window that gets several hours of sun each day. The more light, the better.
LED Grow lights are cheap and don’t get hot. I use mostly Barrina T5s but there’s other brands and styles more aesthetically pleasing.
Thank you for coming to my plant talk. This is general information and you should verify it applies to the type of plant you have.
That’s really kind of you!
I have a stick. It wasn’t always a stick, but it certainly didn’t manage to get any worse.
“humbliong”
Cactus? I have one that gets watered every once in a moon and lives in the bathroom where the climate switches from tropics to arctic to desert every few hours.
Most cacti are very easy to kill, though.
Grow them in a poorly lit room for a while, then suddenly move them into a full sun window or even outdoors. Grow them super dry and forget about them for a couple of years, then suddenly start watering them regularly in the middle of winter. Simply water them too much all year round. Ignore them entirely until they become infested with scale insects. Leave them outside on a bitterly cold night with a hard freeze (obviously doesn’t apply to temperate species).
Realistically what I often see is that a lot of cacti are very good at persisting in very poor conditions for very long periods of time because they’re adapted to going dormant and slowly growing during tough times and short windows of good times. That doesn’t mean this is the case for all cacti, of course.
And the number of times I’ve seen obviously dead cactus husks in offices and people’s homes where the humans in their lives are completely oblivious to the fact that their cactus house plant is super dead is … well, it’s probably in the double digits. Which is kind of a lot under the circumstances.
I had a coworker once who grew a cactus on his desk. I mentioned to him that I think it’s dead, but I never pushed too hard. He brought up the fact that he got the plant when he was in college and that was about 15 to 20 years prior, so I didn’t push the “it’s dead Jim” theory very much. Then one day he decided it was time to repot the cactus. The carcass fell over. It was a long-dead, dried husk with a thin veneer of thorns and that’s all. No, I didn’t rub it in that I’d told him it was dead years prior.
Actually I don’t think flowering plants even existed then, it was all like fern kind of stuff, proto trees, and the like.
Flowering plants were around in the Jurassic.
They met the meteor too
I’m gonna make my meteor meet your flower so hard
Hnng end my Mesozoic Era, Daddy
They had insects that far back so I’m assuming they must have had flowering plants.
I was wrong, I think it said 160 million years ago at least for some types. I should have looked it up before I wrote it. Cuz I don’t have a firm knowledge of all that timeline.
I’m a person my age and I both have a kid and can’t keep a plant alive.
I read here that mint was a really easy plant, cause it just keeps growing. One of the 2 fucking died in a couple weeks.
Mint is easy to keep alive, but you gotta not kill it first.
One of those catch 22s
If you plant it successfully, it lives there now.
Even for years after it’s removed the ground has enough seeds for it to regrow for nearly a decade.
Rosemary is like that too. Once it’s established it’s hard to kill.
That’s because it’s vv hardy, it’s rare for rosemary to drop seed like mint does though
Mint just fills the ground with seeds so it can show up forever whenever for whatever reason
Chives are also like that. I think I planted some in my parents garden when I was 12 about 25 years ago and it still keeps coming back every year. Often in different places as it roams around the garden, but I don’t think I’ve ever not had them come up somewhere.
I think they’re also a bulb plant like onions or garlic so they grow and spread underground.
Make underground babies that pop up elsewhere.
Like tulips
Aquascapes! Its basically a fishtank without the fish. Many aquatic plants are really easy to grow. Even the needier plants can become easy with a CO2 producer and fertilizer tabs. It sounds complicated but once its set up you can literally forget it for months and worse case is it needs a trim and top off.
Plants vs plant
Snake plant is what you want.
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Snake plant.
