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you didn’t pet the loot bug
They killed a loot bug and they’re not so proud about it but that doesn’t excuse the act 😞
Cock too big
Empathy too good
Too busy smoochin’ owls
She was lookin for the xizz and you were givin her the splarf. Many such cases.
You smoke too tough. Your swag too different.
peekaboo gone wrong
You thought April Fools only lasts for one day? 😏
Marriages typically are regarded as over when one party dies.
She didn’t leave, she’s just hiding.
She’ll come back. She doesn’t know what she’s missing.
Stopped buying Pokémon cards
Oh I thought she left me BECAUSE of the pokemon cards
Your pp is too big
She forgor the way back home
Just to shake things up
She likes how I smell.












