Rolling up the contents of a town into a big, sticky ball.
Placing a billion conveyor belts, strip mining a planet with no regard to the pollution I caused, and full scale genocide against the native bugs who already lived there.
Sorry, biters, I gotta launch my rocket.
Trafficking humans, putting them in tiny 1x1m cages where they cannot sit, force them to do cheap labour, separate their children at birth, and kill them if they are too expensive…
Fuck I love Minecraft!
Fishing
I didn’t realise our poaching laws were that severe
Destroying a coal mine with magic
Spreading democracy for the glory of Super Earth!
Bringing democracy to the wider galaxy.
The purgation of xenos scum and heretic filth with extreme prejudice.
Beating wild animals into submission, capturing them and putting them to work in a shack I built in the woods.
Playing poker with a non-standard deck.
I swear officer, I don’t know how those 15 aces got in this deck…
Assault, battery, torture, stalking, breaking & entering, trespassing, destruction of property, illegal search & seizure, tampering with evidence, aiding & abetting, reckless driving, speeding, operation of an unlicensed vehicle, unlawful interception, child endangerment, unlawful imprisonment, conspiracy, and, of course, vigilantism
But absolutely zero murder
What is Batman?