vent
I’ve been kept up in my house and hardly talking to people IRL for months, I’ve gone to 1 bar all summer and didn’t even keep in contact with anyone I met. The only thing I do is work as a cashier but I hardly talk to customers anymore and when they do it’s just the same copy paste transaction all over again. I tried to use vrchat as a way to still somewhat be social for a number of months but then I got really stressed and quit it because I wasn’t actually making progress.
It’s been pretty bad lately. I can’t really sleep at night because my mind keeps me up and will drive me to tears if I’m not distracting it 24/7. The last 2 days have been awful, the night before last I ended up taking 100mg of melatonin to just get to bed, but was told not to do that by someone on lemmy so last night I stayed up till 4am just crying. I have other medicines called a “boost bar” thats supposed to help but they don’t really do much.
I hardly ate yesterday because I just didn’t see anything that looked appealing, I tried to go to the store to get something but I ended up just getting a snack and leaving because there were too many people and cried on the way home.
Now I’m sitting in my car outside of work crying yet again wondering how bad this shift is gonna be.
yeah some of the friends I made on vrchat (especially at the start) were not the best, I found some few diamonds in the rough.
the situation with the melatonin is that it was only 1 night and they were warning that taking a lot of it can mess with brain chemistry
as for the third thing, turns out I’m an idiot. I googled it and it’s actually called “BuSpar” 😭😭😭
that’s actually really funny I’ve been calling them that for like 6 months LMAO
There are some really shiny diamonds for a certainty. My Prince I met through that platform, so I do not deny its ability to bring folks together. Unfortunately, like you encountered(but hopefully not the darkness I had to encounter) there is a lot of horribleness.
And I gotcha. Still just be mindful, as sudden start-stops even of OTC can be problematic, and you will know more about yourself and your situation. The person was not wholly wrong, as taking too much likely would weaken the body’s natural production of melatonin or cause a spike in its production to meet the hole left by the supplement’s departure. To elaborate a bit more–Melatonin supplements can help with bringing on tiredness in the body, as it is the chemical that helps you to be in a state of sleepiness. Spiking those levels though only does that–spikes tiredness. That can induce sleep sure, and could make it deep(possibly too deep) in doses unregulated by your Doctor, but it is not a sleeping supplement. It is the foil to Caffeine, which is a stimulant that helps shove melatonin and otherwise to the side to functionally trick you into a perceived wakefulness, while your body is actually still in the tired state just not as much conscious to you. None of this is medical advice, simply what I have read up on, since the two are extremely common chemicals people grab way too quickly to meet a believed need that it does not provide, which can be dangerous, especially the “I just need a coffee and I can keep driving,” types.
And ah. To be fair, BuSpar could absolutely be read and remembered as “BuuStbar.” Still pretty funny though, haha.