Its just how do I rebuild my life from absolutely nothing

Idk, my life has so far been endless suffering, I dont trust anyone anymore. I feel like I’m in a house thats burning down, I’m dead regardless of what I choose

They really made him into horse cock so he would fit in

Vaush being a fed is so funny

Unfortunately I only have until august otherwise I habe to go sleep on someone Couch, where my ex who hates me also lives

I think for them it was more of me having higher support needs, I wouldnt just do house chores, and it got worse if I was overwealmed by work. Generally it built as resentment over time

Yeah I’m lowkey scared to live with anyone else do to this, getting kicked out killed me.

No it wasnt my therpist tjay said that it was my friends, sorry that post was typed out. My brain is still fried.

Its been challenging to find a therpist who practices it and accepts medicaid here.

If only these places did anything in my state, legit they kept for 9 days, robbed medicaid, so basiclly I got out with a 30 days prescription of Prozac and I immediately got kicked off medicaid. Like I wish there were actual treatment centers near me or IOP.

I smoke weed if I can get my hands on it which is rarer are rarer these days, I snort crushed uo concerta, doesn’t do much anymore, had better luck actually taking it as prescribed, I used to feel something when I did.

I used to hang out with people but then they got their own lives, I sometimes play video games. Recently its gotten to a point where I dont habe much energy so I just end up sleeping. I sleep like 12 hours a day normally, since my body physically takes that long to recover after a day of doing stuff.

Unfortunately I’m disabled, as much as I would love to grind the trades and then live as cheaply as possible so I didn’t need to work, my body just isnt good enough. Choose sitting behind a terminal bashing the keyboard for that reason.

I’m on leave from work cause I nearly got fired, truthfully I’m too disabled to be doing thay much ohyically labor at the speed they want. But what choice do I have, I’m nervous as I go back on the 29th, and I’m worse now. I ball my eyes out a lot. Its not so much about I have to work forever, but its the fact there’s nothing left really, like if I did work retail forever what is the point exactly. Life is the passage of time, and how you spend that. If I spent 99% of it in some box all day, pushing Freight I can’t afford, getting yelled at by people richer than me. As I get sicker and sadder. What’s the point. Its so bad I disassosite, I lost 3 entire weeks of my life, I did not remember any of it. Just gone like it never happened, my brain deleted it. This happens so much, the time between last April and this April genunily feel like a couple of months ago to me. I just want more than this, anything more then this. I want out.

I’m at that point where I’m just hatec by everyone. -

Let me guess, it won’t work with Linux once so ever without a propetairy nvidia kernel

My honest issue is the us makes everything so impossible, like I get fussed at for being more than 5 minutes late, and can get written up, I could only imagine what I would get if a bus got delayed. There are places I could reasonable bike to but none of them pay enough to cover rent. So I drive my ass to target, and unfortunately I have a car that takes up space it sucks but the us needs massive retooling everything here is systemically fucked

I’m just so burnt out, like something gotta change, genuinely not doing well mentally as a result

I feel like the end goal is us to be using thin client that can’t even browse the web, we will have a content slop scrolled in the middle, you swipe right and you have an AI chat box to search information, send messages, it all has to be done with AI. Oh and you need scan your ID and pay subscriptions for each AI feature you enable, you will own nothing and work all day you won’t have time to browse the web so the AI will do it for you

That’s what I’m saying, it would be more complicated than a dongle, the PS5 has some sorta system that handles this, it would essientally be a device that supports it, that just decodes and encodes the video feed, as dumb as this sounds it’d the only soluations to use on most TVs