At least your parents are free from intestinal parasites

I think its just people that can’t tell memes from facts.

Welcome to cop city.

He lyin

Seems like the headline is framing this problem in a very alien way.

Dentist never heard of a mint?

Also I thought morning brushing was about teeth because most smells are on the tongue not the teeth unless there’d an abscess or something.

Does everybody brush/scrape their tongue every morning?

Imo the real war is between fresh jammies vs naked sleepers

100% taxes on any billionaire that complains about taxes.

How is this “slammed” and not “whined at”?

This doesn’t grapple with the actual reality though where all this info is filtered through celebrities and pastors.

You’ve never once grabbed the movie theater water bottle instead of the actual water bottle?

From the guys that brought you “the iran war is over” and “alex pretti drew a gun”

“smells bad and makes me tired” is my main takeaway from weed about 90% of the time

If she’s not you’re going to be so cute to her when you hear the news.

Convention sounds like a banger.

Beef wellington also just a sauceless hot pocket.

Nothing says “I’m going to kill my whole family when I inevitably lose my job for being an insufferable dick” like this post.

I think its a great way to test if people have weird attitudes about personal space and food.

Show up in a fursuit to establish ???

But really, the obvious thing to do is go eye for an eye and steal their food in turn.

They just like us for real