Are_Euclidding

A lot of racists have black friends

it's really a miracle that he isn't LGBT phobic.

He sure is queerphobic, in that he refuses to change the queerphobic beliefs he clearly holds.

I don't know why you keep repeating this line as though it's true. It isn't.

so that was definitely influenced by her

Oh cool, so Kirby only has bigoted beliefs because his sister has them. Is Kirby incapable of independent thought?

I also don't care what Kirby told you about his ban. The inciting incident has been linked multiple times in this thread. There's also a link to a separate thread in which he repeatedly doubles down on bigotry, on a different topic. You can read these for yourself and see the disgusting bigotry on display.

I've changed my mind about being ok with him coming back. I hadn't realized him doubling down on bigotry was a pattern. Now that I see it is, no thanks.

Yup! And calling people born with ambiguous genitalia "deformed" and saying they should be forced to undergo surgery to "correct" their genitals is so incredibly shitty. The ban was well-deserved, for sure

Here's a link to the exchange. There are a couple removed comments by Kirby, those should still be in the hexbear modlog probably, but I didn't actually go looking for them, I think the thread is clear enough even with the missing comments.

https://hexbear.net/comment/6302820

I don't want this thread to turn into a fight, but I feel I have to address one piece of your comment here: yes, Kirby has some trans- and intersex-phobic beliefs. You are not in a position to say he doesn't, when his own words show so clearly that he does.

Let me make a slightly broader point: people who are not themselves marginalized have huge blindspots about the marginalization they do not themselves experience.

As a white person, I'm sure I have blindspots regarding race, much as I've tried to learn and be better about racial issues than I was raised to be. If a comrade told me I had said something racist, the correct response from me isn't "nuh-uh, I'm not a racist", it's "oops, I have some brainworms to unlearn, thanks for pointing that out to me".

Same thing with Kirby here. He, his brother, and now you have all said "Kirby isn't transphobic". But he sure does have some trans- and intersex-phobic beliefs that he is apparently unwilling to examine.

Just because people can be bigoted shitheads without consequence on other social media does not mean Lemmygrad should allow bigotry from its users!

In fact I would say it's the opposite, Lemmygrad should (and almost always does) hold itself to a much, much higher standard than other social media, because as Marxist-Leninists we want our analysis to be correct and we want marginalized comrades to feel comfortable in this space. If queerphobia goes unchallenged here, queer people will leave. So I'm quite glad that queerphobia isn't tolerated here.

(But I'm fine with Kirby being allowed to come back, as long as he is able to shut the fuck up about queer and intersex people. See my other comment in this thread)

I'm the person who argued with Kirby last, the one who tried to get him to understand that his opinions on trans and intersex people are bigoted shit and he needs to change them. He (and his brother) were entirely unwilling to listen to me. Kirby's first comment back after a month long temp ban was to jump right back in to his argument with me.

So I'm wary of him. However, if he promises to not make any comments about gender or sexuality and as long as he is not made a moderator, I would be quite ok with unbanning him. As long we're all on the same page that further queer- or intersex-phobia will get him immediately banned again, I say go ahead and unban him

spoiler

They really can! It's taken me years to understand that my dad's behavior is Not Ok. It's so easy to think "we could have it so much worse, at least our dad isn't a raging bigot to our faces, so it's unfair to expect better than we get".

And like, that's true, I guess, he could be a raging bigot, but if he were, we would have already cut him out of our lives! In a weird sort of way, that situation would be easier

spoiler

I also would immediately fold and try to do better if a young person I cared about told me I'd messed up! It's wild to me how many full-ass adults can't seem to get out of their own little "I'm the main character" bubble long enough to realize they are being assholes.

It's extremely disappointing that Dad would rather protect his ego than become a better father to his children.

I'm sorry your sister is doing the same shit to her children. That's gotta be hard to watch, for sure

It's time for a far too long rant from me, a person who doesn't spend enough time in the trans mega to feel like I have any right to ask you lovely people to read my shit!

oof ouch owie family stuff

My dad is a manipulative asshole and I'm having a hard time coming to terms with that.

My sister and I are both trans and have been out for years at this point. My dad and sister have always had a strained relationship, which has ebbed and flowed over the years. Recently, their relationship seemed really good, the best it's been since before she was a teenager. My dad was being kind and my sister was enjoying spending time with him.

That is, until about a week and a half ago when my dad and sister spent the day together doing a really neat folk tradition in the town where we grew up. Because my fucking dad misgendered my sister all day. Literally every time he introduced her to someone or spoke about her it was "my son" and "he".

My sister sent him a text the next day basically saying "hey, I can't talk to you for awhile, the way you acted yesterday was unacceptable, I'll get in contact again when I'm ready" and he texts back with (paraphrased) "it's so hard for me that you're trans, I didn't understand that it was real and not a phase, trans women are in such danger, a good proportion of them detransition, I'm sad I'll never have grandchildren, my life has been so hard since my divorce, and also my dad was a real piece of work and I'm way better than he was".

And like, fucking hell is that not the right response!! Not once did he even gesture towards an apology, it was all about how hard it is for him to deal with the fact that my sister is trans.

I talked to him on the phone, trying to figure out what the fuck he was thinking and got the exact same spiel! He started crying (literally crying, my dad uses tears as very effective emotional manipulation, which it somehow took until the conversation I'm relating for me to realize) about how sad he is that he and Mom are no longer together, which is fucking rich because he divorced her!! It was not mutual, it was entirely my dad's decision to end his marriage, and yet my mom is the evil one for not groveling to try to get back with Dad.

He then proceeded to call my sister childish for refusing to talk to him, and when I said that's not fair and actually he's the one being childish, he told me I should talk to a few adults about the situation to get their take. I'm 35. By any definition I'm an adult, and I said as much to him.

Then at the end of the conversation, Dad made sure to point out to me that he hadn't misgendered my sister a single time in the entire phone conversation. I said that was true and thanked him for it. It was only later that I realized, hang on, Dad never misgenders her when talking to me! I literally don't remember the last time he fucked it up where I could hear him! And that's fucked. It means he knows he should be treating my sister as a woman and is perfectly capable of doing so in certain contexts. He specifically chose to misgender her the day they spent together and his "I'm just a clueless idiot, how could I possibly have known?!?!" is entirely an act!

For so many years I've been making excuses for him: he grew up in a different time, his dad was an abusive pos, he really truly loves us even if he doesn't quite see who we truly are, he's miserable and doesn't understand his own emotions, etc. I think I'm done. I think I can't make these excuses for him any more. He needs to change his behavior or he will never talk to his daughter again, it's straight up that simple.

I'm going to avoid ranting too much about how he has never, not once used they/them pronouns for me. I got over it long ago, even though his reasoning for this inability (which he's happy to share with me), is that "singular they is bad grammar". I've told him, time and time again that that's just not true! Shakespeare used singular they. And furthermore, even if the singular they was actually a new bit of grammar, and not at least as old as Shakespeare, so fucking what! Languages change! Constantly! And that's a good thing!

I think he probably could use my correct pronouns if he cared about who I actually am. Of course it's hard for people his age, of course he'd mess up sometimes, but you know? He could fucking try. He won't, but he could if he cared to. I can't excuse his lack of trying anymore. Sure, I don't really care, I'm comfortable enough in my gender that it doesn't bother me when people use he or she for me, but his not even pretending to try is more evidence that he just doesn't care enough about his children to see us as real people. And that's a little fucked, really

The stander is Donald Trump (US president), the croucher is Keir Starmer (UK prime minister)

You're so incredibly correct! And on top of everything, walking rules! It's so fun to go for a walk, either alone or with friends. I frequently, when the weather is good, finish the last part of my commute on foot, because even though it takes longer than waiting for the bus, the walk is way more pleasant than waiting at a bus stop!

I love walking! Wish we still lived within (easy) walking distance of the grocery store! That was great

I didn't like it! I thought it was boring and better skipped! These things are so very subjective!

I can't agree. Sure, release order is how I'd almost always choose to engage with a series, but that's because I don't trust hardly anyone to tell me which order to experience stuff in!

If I do trust someone who's well-versed in a series and they tell me to experience works in a certain order, yeah, I'd do that. But everything is so subjective, you really have to trust the person who is telling you which order you should engage with the works in the series, and on the internet, that trust is hard to build.

But still, I definitely think there are frequently arguments for skipping a certain title in a series, or reading a series in some order other than publication order. Not every work in a series is going to be as easy to get into as every other, and often earlier entries are clunkier than later ones.

For some concreteness:

In The Elder Scrolls, I started with Oblivion (IV) and I'm glad I did. I went back to Morrowind (III) later and I think I enjoyed it more because I sort of knew what an Elder Scrolls title is like.

I played Pathologic 2 before Pathologic 1 and would never suggest anyone start with Pathologic 1.

The first Dark Souls game I beat is Dark Souls 3, after bouncing off Dark Souls 1 pretty hard.

We've been watching the Predator movies recently, and I'd suggest skipping the original Predator and jumping straight to Predator 2, unless you really like Arnold Schwarzenegger or you're really, really into the series. The original Predator is just boring, in a way the later ones aren't. (It's also, arguably, the best of them in terms of cinematography, themes, the overall craft, etc. I wouldn't be surprised if there's a large contingent of people who hate the Predator movies other than the first. Which kind of complicates my argument, but I stand by it!)

I'm sure there are other relevant examples, but I sure can't think of them at the moment!

I often do toast. Or tofu scramble, but that's become more of a dinner food because it takes time to make. But I do love leftover scramble for breakfast! I also sometimes do grits. And lately I've been doing tater tot wraps, with a little (vegan) cheese, some spinach, refried beans, and whatever hot sauce/salsa is hanging out in the fridge.

Yes, remove all animal ag subsidies so that cow flesh is as expensive as it should be.

The only thing I can think when I read the phrase "price stability"

I made tofu scramble pies a few months ago! They were incredible, although definitely a bit of work.

For the pie crust, I did a standard short crust pastry situation using vegan butter and vegetable shortening for the fat.

For the tofu scramble I usually start by cooking some (vegan) sausage, we really like the Lightlife GimmeLean, but whatever is easy and cheap will work. I bet soyrizo would be incredible, we just can't find any where we live currently. Then once the sausage is cooked (usually in patties, whatever, it'll get crumbled into the rest of the scramble in awhile), remove it from the pan and set aside.

Then in the same pan, saute an onion, a bell pepper, and a spicy pepper of some sort, usually a poblano or jalapeno, whatever looks good at the store. Then once the veggies are pretty soft, but definitely before they begin to brown, crumble in a (pressed) block of firm or extra firm tofu. Add nooch (nutritional yeast), turmeric for color, and whatever other seasonings and things you'd think you'd like, as well as salt and pepper, of course. We usually do oregano, cumin, (dried) parsley and a touch of brown mustard. Then when you're happy with how cooked the veggies and tofu are, crumble in the sausage, and also a can of beans, we usually do pinto, but it doesn't matter.

You want to let the scramble cool to room temperature before filling the pies so you don't melt the fat before it goes in the oven.

Then once the scramble is cooled, make the pies and toss them in the oven at like 400 fahrenheit for like an hour, or until the pastry is cooked. I've never had the filling overcook doing this, but if you're worried, just slightly undercook your scramble.

Then, finally, you're going to want some gravy to top the pies, because the tofu scramble is (purposefully) fairly dry. For a gravy, I'll start with a roux (cook together oil and flour), then I add milk, we usually use almond, but whatever you have on hand is fine. You want to season your gravy pretty well, if you have extra sausage that was too much for the scramble, adding some to the gravy is nice. Otherwise, you're going to want to get some umami flavor from wherever you can. We buy this mushroom stir-fry sauce from an Asian market and I find that it really improves a gravy. You also want your gravy to be heavily peppered. If you think you've added enough black pepper, toss another shake in, just to be safe.

And then yeah, the pies come out of the oven, you let them cool for a couple of minutes, then spoon or pour the gravy on top, and they are so very good!!!

It's not an easy meal, really, but it is extremely, extremely delicious! And the tofu scramble part is a full meal by itself that's actually quite easy. It's just the added complication of pastry and gravy that makes stuff difficult. But it's so, so good that I find it's worth it!

I'm one of the least confrontational and least aggressive people that talk about Marxism here on Lemmy.

I legit think it's this! You're always so calm and composed and you treat the comments you're arguing against with such respect, more than they often deserve. I think it makes it really hard for people to argue against you in a compelling way, and it pisses people off that their arguments look so bad in comparison to yours

Are_Euclidding_Me [e/em/eir]

@ Are_Euclidding_Me @hexbear.net

Posts

0
Comments

221
Joined

3 yr. ago

Are_Euclidding_Me [e/em/eir]

Bring back Kirbywithwhip1987 if you can, I am his friend, he's in terrible situation and I'm worried about his mental health [CW: mental health and violence]

Bring back Kirbywithwhip1987 if you can, I am his friend, he's in terrible situation and I'm worried about his mental health [CW: mental health and violence]

Bring back Kirbywithwhip1987 if you can, I am his friend, he's in terrible situation and I'm worried about his mental health [CW: mental health and violence]

Bring back Kirbywithwhip1987 if you can, I am his friend, he's in terrible situation and I'm worried about his mental health [CW: mental health and violence]

Bring back Kirbywithwhip1987 if you can, I am his friend, he's in terrible situation and I'm worried about his mental health [CW: mental health and violence]

Bring back Kirbywithwhip1987 if you can, I am his friend, he's in terrible situation and I'm worried about his mental health [CW: mental health and violence]

Bring back Kirbywithwhip1987 if you can, I am his friend, he's in terrible situation and I'm worried about his mental health [CW: mental health and violence]

Bring back Kirbywithwhip1987 if you can, I am his friend, he's in terrible situation and I'm worried about his mental health [CW: mental health and violence]

Capacitors -Trans Megathread from week 1/12/2026 to 1/18/2026

Capacitors -Trans Megathread from week 1/12/2026 to 1/18/2026

Capacitors -Trans Megathread from week 1/12/2026 to 1/18/2026

Western politics summarized in one picture.

Kim Jong-Un - Novo General Megathread for the 8th-14th of January 2025

let's struggle: 'recommended work orders' for newcomers to a continuity are nonsensical.

let's struggle: 'recommended work orders' for newcomers to a continuity are nonsensical.

vegan breakfast foods

That's right, every home a can of beans. The very best plant based protein for the very best Americans. May a million farts stink!

Federal Reserve Chair Powell makes a video calling out Trump directly

What is your recipe? [preferrably vegan]

User banned from lefty memes for being too good at memes