I know there's important things going on right now, but if someone could spare a minute to help me

So, my therapist is referring me to a psychiatrist who she'll work with to diagnose me, but currently she is leaning towards a social anxiety disorder with depression.

Firstly, I didn't realize SAD was an actual disorder so I hadn't considered it before.

But...I feel really crushed. I'm not trying to use SAD as an excuse or anything, but it feels like conscious brain knows what I should be doing as a communist, but my subconscious instinct over protects me and prevents me from actually being able to be social and organize and such. I just feel like such a useless sack of meat.

If anyone else here has suffered with this, could I ask for some advice, please?