This seems like the audience for the Bulwer-Lytton competiton, in which “participants write an atrocious opening sentence to the worst novel never written.”
2023 Grand Prize winner submission:
She was a beautiful woman; more specifically she was the kind of beautiful woman who had an hourlong skincare routine that made her look either ethereal or like a glazed donut, depending on how attracted to her you were.
I’ve been rewatching the Alien movies and this one got a small giggle out of me, from the 2021 competition:
Believe it or not Ripley refrained from firing her laser at the alien creature lurking in the starship’s ceiling above the crew’s happy hour gathering, its dripping secretions burning through the titanium floor like it was made of cheap wet toilet paper, when she discovered by sheer accident that just one drop of the oozing substance reacted with the contents of her cocktail glass to produce a martini so perfect that 007 himself would have betrayed Queen and country for just one sip, as long as it was shaken and not stirred.
This one nails a very real trope I dislike; ridiculous proper “fantasy” names:
In obedience to the Thousand-year Mandate of Hawksrealm, following the prophecy of Glenfrik the Morrowsayer, Klagnar and his (thus far) loyal Deathsword Warriors journeyed countless skyturns across the Burning Plains of Hellsplat and the Great Eastern Doomsea to an immense, shining folkshive that more or less resembled Fresno, but with a more genre-appropriate name.
This is my favorite pet peeve. I got through 6 pages of a fantasy novel where the writer spent multiple paragraphs describing alcohol made from potatoes and then called it “voka.”
Those 6 pages hit on every trope possible. Not even in an entertaining way. It took itself way too seriously.
This seems like the audience for the Bulwer-Lytton competiton, in which “participants write an atrocious opening sentence to the worst novel never written.”
2023 Grand Prize winner submission:
I’ve been rewatching the Alien movies and this one got a small giggle out of me, from the 2021 competition:
This one nails a very real trope I dislike; ridiculous proper “fantasy” names:
This is my favorite pet peeve. I got through 6 pages of a fantasy novel where the writer spent multiple paragraphs describing alcohol made from potatoes and then called it “voka.”
Those 6 pages hit on every trope possible. Not even in an entertaining way. It took itself way too seriously.
Oh god not the capital letters! I always associate those with bad fantasy.
While I agree with you on the whole, there are some real world places with names that go hard.
Like Dead Man’s Pass, Oregon. Or Devil’s Gate, Utah.
…Maybe it’s just a Western US thing.
This is so bad it’s good.