Most of us met in elementary school, adding people little by little, as we got older. I think we’re special because of our shared history and I think each of us has at least one other person that shares a hobby or at the very least, has knowledge on that subject. I’m not sure if we’ve evolved, I still view them like when we were younger, except we don’t see each other as often as we used to due to having families, which is fine and to be expected. Honestly, I think our wives talk to each other much more often than the hubbies do.
school. theoretically work should work the same way but im one of those folks who likes to keep work seperate.
Met over twitch and still are budys. He knew how i was in my deepest cringiest youngest teens and how i evolved over time. And yet we never saw each other irl. He is only 2 hours drive away xD
My guy friend and I are pretty close even when we met 2 years ago. We met in animation class for college. We talked about our hobbies and interests, helped each other with assignments, and we had the same classes for the next 2 semesters. We became friends pretty quickly.
He asked me about my lore/my life and I was able to be vulnerable with him the more I got to know him. He’s a safe and chill person to be with. I was able to trust him with my secrets. That’s what made our bond so special–he’s been there for me and I’m there for him too.
I developed feelings for him. I confessed and got turned down. We’re still very close friends and would help each other out.
Thanks for sharing! How do you cope with being turned down? Did something change for you?
I got sad and disappointed when he rejected me, so I cried for a day, then got my shit together and remembering what I’m worth for the next few days after that. I just kept in mind that it’s his choice and I was trying to logic my way out of it. Because in reality, he works a lot (he helps pay majority of his share of the rent for his family), takes care of his ill grandmother everyday, and goes to university full time. So even if we did date, he would struggle to find the time to priorize me. His work/life balance isn’t the best.
Having a crush on someone makes me idealize them, ignoring their flaws/red flags even when I know they’re not this “perfect” person (nobody is perfect ya know?). Though, I wanted to give dating another shot.
What changed was my relationship with myself. I started asking myself “do I even want a relationship right now?” “do I have the emotional capacity to handle my own emotions and another person’s emotions too?”, “Am I just lonely?” and just being honest. The more I re-evaluate, the more I realized I need a lot of time to be on my own. I began to question why dating is a thing, what’s the point, what I wanted out of life, and if marriage is something I want for my own life. Because relationships aren’t the only thing in life that matters and it shouldn’t be the only thing someone revolves their life around.
I met him when I was still healing from my breakup. He became a safe space for me and I latched onto him quickly. My brain wasn’t thinking very clearly that year. 😭. He has the qualities I look for in a boyfriend (caring, respectful, supportive, thoughtful, empathetic), but being a good person doesn’t necessarily equate to being a good partner.
I’m sorry you had to go through this. But it sounds like you have grown from the experience.
Sure, relationships aren’t the only thing in life that matters. But they are one of the most important parts if not the most important. I’m not just talking about romantic relationships but relationships in general. In the end, we humans are social creatures. My life changed a lot, when I realized the importance of connection. But maybe I am just projecting here.
Differently. I have two friends “left” from kindergarten. Some from school. And then there are some which I only know because of wider music and scene related friend-groups, starting at the age of 14. Sharing the same socio-econimical Background and similar familiy related histories with most, which gives us similar problems in life. I really enjoy being around those people for such a long time (Am over 30 now), knowing their ups and downs in life, where they come from.
I met my best friend in an online open-source game that was pretty popular at the time (so far as foss games go). We were both into making games of our own and got talking because of that
He taught me the bits of programming I found particularly challenging, and we generally just chatted a lot and shared and played what we were making or came across online. He’s now a full-time game developer at a tiny company (so he does everything from coding to sysadmin to customer support) and I’m doing IT security consultancy where customer contact and an understanding of how networks and systems run is also core to the job. Kind of surprising how close they are, but also different enough that I’m sometimes surprised what he doesn’t know about security (not things he should have known necessarily, but still) and conversely I find the insights about game development still very interesting. Multiplayer lag hiding, as a random example. We’re a super good match. He lives about a day driving away so we see each other every few winter/summer holiday seasons since I was ~17, at which time we met up for the first time at the only LAN party ever organised for this game (where I had the honor of making the website and meeting all these friends I hitherto only chatted with, still probably the best weekend of my life). He lives in like the most beautiful mountainous region that never gets old to this flatlander. I’m so lucky to have a friend like this, never judging, always available, understands me exactly
Thanks for sharing! What game is it?
the people i went to grad school were smart and nice people who were mostly there for the same purpose I was, hence i became close with them and it was cool. only folks in my life who didn’t mock me for reading and studying and learning shit. they all got married to each other and had kids and moved to rural areas and I visit them once every few years.
have had lots of other friends past and present but without that core level of common interest, values, and respect, they pretty much all withered and no longer became worthwhile. I really lose interest in being friendly with people when they show themselves to be spiteful, selfish, and petty.
We met my freshman year of college. I met my future roommate and one of my best friends early on, because we were both in band and trombone choir together, and lived in the same dorm building. I met my other best friend during freshman J term, because we all worked the same shift in the cafeteria. We started hanging out, and then had a big bonding moment with a few other people that made up our entire friend group for the rest of college: an all nighter working on a paper.
I also consider my cousin to be one of my best friends. I’ve known him since he was born, and I’m just a little less than a year older than him.
bold of you to assume I have friends
