It hurts being lonely. I feel that the last 3 years I have been in isolation. With more and more friends growing apart as you age, I never felt so disconnected from others than I do now.

I grew a lot as a person in this city, but what hurts is that the little friends I had left here, only 1 asked to make arrangements before I go. I did ask other friends to see them or to tell them when I’m free, but they don’t seem interested, and I won’t ask again. This is painful. Just a realislzation I already knew. This is devastating and humiliating.

It hurts being this lonely.

  • GiantChickDicks@lemmy.mlEnglish
    1·
    3 days ago

    I’m sorry you’re feeling so lonely. I can certainly understand why this reaction to you leaving can rub salt in that old wound.

    You mentioned that you grew a lot during your time in this city. That’s great, and it sets a stronger internal foundation for you on your new adventure! Something that might be important to consider is that can be difficult to form lasting friendships in times of change. In my experience, this is especially true when it comes to internal changes.

    I know for me, maintaining friendships that I’ve made during these kinds of times can be really challenging. It means I’m likely more focused on myself (which is perfectly fine and healthy) and not in the most stable place in one way or another where reciprocal relationship building can be prioritized. That doesn’t mean you and your friend group don’t really care about each other, but rather that we can only offer and receive the support we need in the circumstances we’re given.

    I truly hope you don’t write these friendships off. It very well could be that your friends wanted to show up for you more, but they didn’t know how without being intrusive feeling like they’re stepping on your toes. Maybe not, but it’s worth keeping that door open in my opinion. Things may look differently when you’re settled and these raw feelings wear off.

    Either way, you’re starting an exciting new chapter that’s going to bring a lot of different opportunities. It seems like you have a clear idea of what you want and are currently missing, so you can take that knowledge and be mindful of prioritizing building a new community.

    If I’m projecting too much of my own bullshit here I apologize. I wish you all the best in your move!