You ascend to the pearly gates. Saint Peter stands there, or the Islamic equivalent, whatever, holding a book with your record. He flips through it.
“Let’s see. Beat his wife and kids, no problem. Stole massive amounts of money, okay. Generally racist, shouldn’t be an issue. Killed a man in cold blood. It was a Jew, so no great loss. Wait. You used pork paintballs? Are you fucking kidding me?”
A hole opens beneath you. You fall straight to hell.
Observe, the species, Doesn’t Know How Voting Works in its natural habitat: the comment thread. When confronted with the basic mechanics of civic participation, it emits a plaintive cry "What options did you leave me with?” as though choice itself were an external force imposed upon it by predators known as “corporate Dems.”
Note the confusion. The species believes voting is something that happens after all desired outcomes are guaranteed, rather than the mechanism by which those outcomes are pursued. It demands that representatives be voted out before it votes, a remarkable example of temporal dislocation. Cause and effect have collapsed into one another.
This behavior is not malicious, merely maladaptive. Faced with imperfect options, the creature opts for ritualized sulking instead of strategic participation. It mistakes abstention for leverage, and indignation for agency.
A tragic irony, really. By refusing to engage, Doesn’t Know How Voting Works ensures the very conditions it claims to despise persist, then wonders aloud how such a thing could possibly have happened. Fascinating.
You literally started your comment with "lol wut"?
My condensation is quite warranted. I simply addressed your misplaced confidence and you didn't like it. I have absolutely no responsibility to be nice to you.
I think people are using the world wide web less now and much differently. Most people don't browse websites like going to ESPN.com or newgrounds or something. Problem use apps now and only a select few for that matter.
My wife can't even find her safari browser in her iPhone which she's glued to most of the day. For her is 90% email and 10% tiktok.
In 2006, email monitoring was nowhere near what it is today. Filters existed, but they were largely keyword and pattern based, think regex and spam signatures. There was no large scale semantic analysis, no contextual language understanding, and no practical NLP capable of inferring intent. Compute and storage constraints alone made deep inspection of email bodies impractical at scale. Most enforcement relied on metadata headers, IPs, sender reputation, not true content comprehension. Comparing 2006 capabilities to modern transformer based language analysis is simply ahistorical.
But yes Gmail is so much more secure now. You know, Gmail as in Google Mail, the largest marketing firm in existence, capable of serving personalized advertisements simply by scanning the contents of your email.
Your confidence is directly proportional to how incredibly wrong you are.
School zones and stopping for the school bus are probably the only traffic laws I truly and fully support.
Children are most vulnerable to being hit by cars near schools and in residential areas.