“I am the terror that flaps in the night.”

Perfect answer. Thank you for everything you do for wildlife and for this community!

You’ve (re)named that cat “Ferdinand”, right?

Absolutely beautiful bird.

I assume a lot of nature photography is trust- and reputation-based, but are there any other checks to keep generated images from taking over here?

Edit: I dont mean to imply that this image is generated! The question is completely irrelevant to the picture, but I’m a silly goose with no impulse control when a question pops into my head.

Edit2: Totally understand if you don’t want to give away any existing checks to make them easier to get by, btw.

Agree with a lot, and want to add: it doesn’t eat even a fraction of the time that doomscrolling reddit did. My feeds actually have an end and refreshing often does nothing, so I can put my phone away and try breaking the habit of picking it right back up again.

An issue I observe in kids is that children lack positive, physically available, male role models. Women can raise kids to be very tender and empathetic, but at some point most boys will start to model themselves after the men they see around them.

I guess the issue then exacerbate if they as adults are surrounded by only men who don’t check each others behaviour, but I have no eyes in men-only groups.

I would not volunteer to socialise men, as I do enough free emotional labour for the men in my life as it is. I might consider it if it was well paid and didn’t interfere with my actual job or hobbies. But honestly it sounds a bit scary, like the sort of event that would draw in angry hateful men who are looking for ways to be triggered by women speaking their mind, along with the ones open to learning, plus I abhor public speaking so it sounds like a terrible way to spend my precious time. Men need to be the ones modelling safe behaviour for boys, and men need to be the ones telling other men off when they behave like dogs and teach them how to control themselves.

I second the person saying dance lessons. There have been plenty of men in my group that have been shy or nervous or socially awkward, but everyone who follows dances with everyone who leads (which is usually but not exclusively a male/female split).

(Ps. Are you aware of asexuality? Might be something to look into for yourself)

Create shade wherever the sun shines, on the outside before the sun even hits the house. Focus especially on shading the glass and metall parts of your house. Make it angled and with some distance from the house so it still allows air flow. Mesh will shade less but allow more airflow and tarp will block pretty much all wind byt also pretty much all sun, so experiment with the tradeoff for different parts of the house like near windows or over the roof.

Where I live that’s enough to keep me reasonably, so thats all I know. Probably need to learn more with the more extreme weather we have now.

Taking a step back and really looking at who they really are, how they really behave, not hiw I imagine them to be or intentions I assume they have.

Either because they turn out to be pretty bland people I have been able to bulid fantasies around or because our issues was actually just their bad behaviour that I was able to imagine excuses for, or because I realise that we are not a good match (we want different things or tend to trigger each other in unhealthy ways) and a relationship between us would be more hurt than it’s worth.

Like you seeing her ableism and homophobia instead of just your fantasies around who she is and how your relationship would be.

No, I pretty clearly stated it was my opinion, not everyone elses.

People who post aren’t a monolith either, but have a wide range of experiences and worries. Do you even know if this is my only account?

Kind of depends on the situation. The compliment I’d want most is vastly different coming from a boss or coworker, or a child, my parents, a friend or a lover.

But in general something tied to reality works best, when I’ve done something recently that ties into the praise. That goes both for practical stuff like how creatively or well I did a work task or built a table, and more personal/interpersonal stuff like how kind or insightful I’ve been when listening and giving advice to a troubled friend.

I want to write gnocchi code, where each little nugget is good on its own and they still blend together perfectly in the sauce. But I still end up with mashed potato-code if I don’t watch myself.

Never knew one could look so regal while hiding/blending into the background.

Heres my opinion: Votes doesn’t matter, it merely inhibits conversation when we can express your reaction to a post with a click of a button instead of explaining our own thoughts on the matter.

Just post what you want to post and try to avoid looking at the number, or go over to an app or instance that doesn’t show votes, or allows you to select your own settings for votes, or only shows upvotes.

Dont worry, I have the brainpower to spare today and so I felt it’s worth it. It aligns with how I want to face the world, you know?

Having faith in people even for a moment gives me great cognitive harmony, so even when I lose, I win!

I don’t even think people need to be pushed, rather it’s natural that the minds of people who spend a lot of time together start to align. In what way they align is where leadership and peer pressureand propaganda plays a role… But I’d love to check it out. Do you have any specific material to start me off?

Btw, I really appreciate that your writing is more calm and focused on connecting and helping me understand you, rather than coming off as antagonistic, these past few messages. Thank you.

I’d like to recommend a book that kick-started my journey into thinking about and understanding humans as social animals and why we gather as we do. The deeply ingrained need to eat, dance, and gossip, and how that might translate into modern times by marching together. And also how important compassion and empathy is for our survival, and why it might feel more distant the bigger our world has become.

Dawn over the Kalahari : how humans became human by Lasse Berg.

There are other books in the series tackling more modern times that I haven’t read (I haven’t found them in a language I speak well enough) that might actually be even more relevant to where you are today if you can find and understand them… but even the first book, particularly towards the end tying it all together and the social shift from gatheres to farmers, was a great philosophical jumping off point for me.

The first half is quite dry and I’m sure there is better material out there but this one did it for me back in the day. Hopefully it holds up still, and perhaps you’ll find it interesting.

So I’m guessing the context is war and it’s the fact that soldiers are depicted that triggered you?

If you just put something like “I hate how this glorifies the navy/army/ww2” before your rant, I’m sure people would understand where you’re coming from and be more receptive to your message.

This patronising and disconnected type of commenting is not going to make any meaningful impact on the people receiving it - quite the opposite; you make people want to ignore you when you’re being hostile out the gate for no reason.

If your goal is to make people turn off their ears and ignore anything you try to tell them, you’re doing a splendid job though.

I’m sorry, you still haven’t given any context for this type of rant. Is the cat supposed to be Hitler, or a lamb on a bandwagon? What set you off about this picture?

We can’t read your mind, so you need to explain why you’re going into a tirade, because it just makes no sense here… and I’m sure people are willing to understand if you just make the effort to be understood.

Being able to forge a new relationship with them after a few years apart. To get to know and understand them as flawed people rather than imperfect parents, and them in turn learning to respect and trust me as an adult.

And being able to take as long baths as I want without any disruptions.

Literally the kind of response I expect from my schizofrenic acquaintances when they’re off their meds - sure the sentence structure is there and the words fit together, but it’s utter nonsense and completely out of context.