Nice job articulating your arguments. Now that you've explained your stance, it can foster better discussion.
Since this explanation is so far down the thread, I suggest editing one of your more top level comments to include these points for better engagement.
I will say this: the whole point of Lemmy and federation is to have control. Each instance gets to choose what's important for them. A singular UX experience isn't possible by design. But that's not to say there's no room for improvement.
The term "sideloading" has been around since the 90s. Source: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sideloading