What in the ever loving fark Australia!?

A ship of fools you say?

Excuse me, uh did you say yutes?

Yeah your honor the two yutes.

Uh, what is a yute?

Oh excuse me your honor - two youTHs.

Good grief. You couldn’t pay me to go on a cruise. I just… don’t get it.

It’s been said - you can basically go anywhere if you walk fast and carry a clipboard.

Also if you wear high vis and carry a ladder. I’ve seen YouTube videos of the ladder shenanigans - (un)surprisingly effective.

Good grief! 70 year old husband dies on board, 69 year old wife medevaced and dies in a hospital in South Africa. Prob a dream holiday for this Dutch couple who aren’t going home again.

170 passengers in 80 cabins, 52 crew and ONE DOCTOR I can’t even imagine how stressful it would be - you spend 99.9% of your time getting paid to be on a cruise - deal with minor injuries and prob too many hangovers - telling yourself this is a pretty sweet gig, then BAM nightmare of a lifetime scenario. You’re stuck on a ship, responsible for the wellbeing of over 200 people who are all now freaking out over a yucky and potentially deadly virus killing fellow travellers.

The racial metaphor is misplaced and disingenuous to the conversation. Let’s say as a woman, just about all of your women friends have been at some point attacked by a dog. Some have been completely mauled, some have managed to fight the dog off after a couple of bites, some managed to run away from the dog and jump into a car before it could bite them, and most have a combination of stories from their lives. Some are traumatised and scarred for life, others have been able to move on largely as normal, but they haven’t forgotten that scary moment.

Now our woman may or may not have been attacked by a dog before, but because of all these experiences she’s seen her friends go through, the fear, the lifelong injuries they carry - the pain, the embarrassment, the shame, the blame - she’s pretty anxious about getting a dog. Especially one where she doesn’t know its history. It’s a big dog, strong, gorgeous and seems so sweet wagging his tail. But most dogs are like that when you first meet them. It’s the rarest of dog that shows you complete aggression from the beginning and you know full well to stay away from them. She doesn’t know if she brings this dog into her home, if something seemingly benign might set it off. It’s even riskier if she lives alone.

(As an aside, isn’t it ridiculous that a woman should feel embarrassed or ashamed for having been attacked by a dog… or good god - blamed for inciting it - was she carrying beef jerky visibly as she walked down the street, she should have known a wild dog couldn’t control itself at the sight of jerky??)

If the frequency of dog attacks were as prevalent as violence and assault against women is - no one would be allowed to keep a dog for a pet. Sure, it’s NOT ALL DOGS, but the likelihood and the severity of the consequences is such that you’d be crazy to go into the situation of dog ownership without taking precautions, and in the back of your mind you’ll keep remembering all those friends who’s dogs were sweet right up until they weren’t.

People who have beautiful dogs at home, who see their dog snuggle their baby and is sweet to their cat, and have only ever had warm interactions with dogs won’t understand the fear. Not all dogs they’ll say.

Someone else will come along and say it’s only brown dogs you have to worry about. (Sounds ludicrous in this phrasing doesn’t it).

But you know what the difference is between dogs and humans. In a pack of dogs, the good dogs will call out the bad ones. They’ll pin them down, bark at them, gnash their teeth - make it clear that’s not acceptable if you want to be a part of this pack. Even when play fighting gets a little rough - they say when it’s enough. The dogs keep each other in line.

What we’re seeing in life is that the dogs are saying to women, not all dogs are going to maul you and leave you with scars for life. Most of us are good dogs, and it’s not fair you’re scared of us when we’re not doing the attacking. We’re not seeing enough good dogs giving strong reinforcement. Making sure they’re being well socialised when they’re growing up. They’re not going out and engaging with younger pups and teaching them how to behave properly, they’re not even pulling their friends into line and baring their teeth saying that behaviour is not ok. Even as a joke.

The point is - every woman has multiple stories of people she knows being victimised, and sadly the odds are, she will have some kind of personal experience with it in her lifetime. The impact of being assaulted is every bit as lifelong and traumatic for the victim as a frenzied dog attack.

If we treated it with the severity it really carries, and according to the overwhelming frequency with which it occurs. We’d realise a response of “not all men” is not enough.

I’ve come to enquire about your spoons.

Also

My spoon is too big, my spoon is too big. I am a bananaaaaaaaa

Omg. I’ve accessed a very old brain partition:

I’m beached es bru.

I feel like this is up there with how parliamentarians interject: “Point of Order☝️” I can def see that in a BDSM scenario. Point of order madam chairwoman, the instruction is to make no sound. Is that intended vocal-based sound or is this an FPS stealth scenario on Expert difficulty?

I have only these to offer. ()

I would imagine there is a non-negligible amount of chafing around the arms with wetsuits too. Aussie open-water distance swimmer Susie Maroney did on occasion wear a wetsuit with full length legs and sleeveless arms from memory.

Por Que no los dos!?

Hello I’m doctor Jesus, good morning how are you I’m doctor Jesus.

Thank god fifa will be in town soon to give him his second consecutive crackerjack peace prize.

And have no sense of humour, whimsy, imagination, creativity or adventure.

You used the word “were” instead of “was”. You’re well on your way compadre! I believe in you!

Jacarandas smell funny to me. I’d have the same expression if you put my nose in them too!

Congratulations to you both. When you first started posting Sandy, I wasn’t into yet - I could see your care and commitment to her, but hadn’t become invested. You both have won me over.

I really respect and admire your love for her, and the kindness and dedication you show. She’s so lucky to have you in her life looking out for her, and I can see she’s giving you so much love and satisfaction and purpose in return.

Two lovely souls spending quality time together. Very heartwarming.

That’s “Newman’s Own”’s secret.

Is that like the FIFA Peace Prize?