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InitialsDiceBearhttps://github.com/dicebear/dicebearhttps://creativecommons.org/publicdomain/zero/1.0/„Initials” (https://github.com/dicebear/dicebear) by „DiceBear”, licensed under „CC0 1.0” (https://creativecommons.org/publicdomain/zero/1.0/)E
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4 yr. ago

  • It's polite to knock first.

  • Sure, but you can do that for free.

  • 2025-08-21

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  • Head lice, field mice, spiders in the kitchen

  • Or, idk, you could just read the bio on their profile?

  • I didn't spell out the connection entirely, because I thought these key phrases would be enough to communicate it:

    my partner was like "No, you will not."

    This wasn't a statement of fact on their part, it was about forbidding me to say the thing.

    But the point wasn't the waitress (...) It was about my partner who, for about five seconds, probably wanted to die.

    There's the crux if it. Whether the waitress reacted by thinking I was a grown adult acting silly or was actually that ignorant, I felt no embarrassment of my own, but I knew it would reflect negatively on my partner. Think about their wounded pride of having to be seen with/connected to me, having "chosen" me. Because, honestly, my intent was to embarrass my partner by association, and I feel I probably surpassed it and achieved "mortify" status. (A stronger form of embarrassment.)

    Overall, a type of benign violation, which the Lemmy hivemind, well-meaning as it may be, simply can't fathom.

    Btw, your German filmmaker story was funny and cool, but as you said, your intent was different.

  • If physics is this strict, the flesh of your enemies is going to pass unharmed through your fangs as well, and that would be sad.

  • Let me go wild...

  • Probably transform into the kind of tiger nobody could see.

  • I'd probably transform into an invisible tiger.

  • Yeah, the responses you're getting are pretty peak Lemmy. People who lack imagination and sense of humor, just ready to assume the worst.

    Since I, too, am not in a joyless relationship, you can have this one that has worked for me: mispronounce really obvious things when you're together in public where others can hear you. For example, once while perusing the cocktail menu at a bar I noticed a drink on the menu called "The FDR." Now, I know how that's pronounced, but I decided that when the waitress came back I would see if I could remain completely straight-faced while ordering "the fidder." I announced my intention and my partner was like "No, you will not."

    So, of course, I had to.

    I pulled it off. The waitress corrected me, and I acted like I had just learned something. But the point wasn't the waitress (who probably went back to the bar with the best story to tell about the dumbass at that table over there). It was about my partner who, for about five seconds, probably wanted to die.

    10/10 comedy, would recommend, would do this kind of thing again (and have).

  • b&

    "bampersand"

  • Because the singles are probably priced like the megalemons they are, and what OP needs is one standard lemon.

    edit: That's not to even mention that those probably won't fit in a juicer, if that's what OP is after.

  • I would totally trust some dildotosser with my money, 100%.

  • Seems plausible, but why now?

  • I mean, they commented earlier than mmmm, and probably thought they were right? All those downvotes they got are appropriate, but I don't understand demanding an explanation for getting something wrong.

  • There were commits yesterday.

  • 2025-08-02

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  • What customer? That's Zog.

  • Bold of you to assume no tariff compliance surcharges.