The key to such heavy customisation in Linux is using a different window manager. The distributions you listed all come with big name ones like GNOME or KDE which are awesome to get started with Linux. OP uses sway so have a look at that. It’s a lot of work to set things up if you go down that path. Make sure you don’t make things so hard on yourself that you end up going back to Windows.
Lot of hate for a project maintained by a volunteer and offered for free here. Nobody forces this free stuff on you.