Just wait it out for a few more years and things will settle down. This isn't anything new... the US has gone through a very similar period of political upheaval and realigning of parties every two or three generations since it was founded. This one isn't even the worst we've had.
Edit: Sorry, I didn't realize you all are part of the problem.
A non-rotating spherical chicken in vacuum might simplify the calculations, but I prefer to get the rotisserie effect.