Why is he staining so hard? He’s freakin’ superman

I coulda done it faster

Like two weeks ago, a leaked report said they were going to blame Tylenol. Guess Tylenol bought him a gold statue or something

There are people who think urine is healthy and, I guess, drink it or something. I used to have a screenshot of a Facebook post where someone asked their fellow urine lovers if they ever put it in a humidifier and there were a lot of replies about how to best do it

I came here to say this too. I find it to be hilarious

“Seinfeld spoke at the school…”

He really shouldn’t be in a school

“this Friday through Sunday.”

It would be a little weird to ask for all this crap if they were renting the place three months later, it’s outright insanity if they’re renting the place in a few days.

A 3 to 1 girl/guy ratio? That’s a porn shoot, right?

I’m not sure if you’re aware but when it became apparent that a big event was happening on the morning of Sept 11, the hospitals braced for mass casualties and… waited… and waited… and they never came.

https://www.marketwatch.com/story/how-they-first-knew-9-11-was-so-horrible-the-patients-didnt-come-11631298343

There were only 20 people pulled from the rubble. Six were firefighters, and 5 were police.

Nurses get a lot of well deserved praise. It’s just that in this case there wasn’t an uptick in emergency medical needs.

But it’s only premarital sex if you get married afterward

I get up earlier on weekends than weekdays. I try to get up at 6am but I often get up to pee at 4am and just stay up. I do a bunch of things and it feels like I’ve had a good day then I realize it’s only like 10am and I still have a whole day ahead of me.

It’s always those damn dirty astronauts. The Upright Citizens Brigade tried to warn us.

One man’s “leave a shit” is another man’s “take a treasure”

I’ve tried a ton of distros but nothing has beat the stability of Slackware. Also been using it since around the same time

That’s what I was thinking. Either that or the coke was a false positive.

Do they make cocaine in pill form?

“We have found that autism is caused by woke”

The guy who made the decision was fired from Space Force for doing right wing podcasts, wrote a book about Marxism in the military and asked Trump to root out “monsters” in the military who support diversity. He’s anti-vax, pro Jan 6, basically his brain is completely given over to any right wing racist concept or conspiracy theory you can think of.

Oh good, I can handle that. Powerpoles have those little grooves where you can slide two of them together but they’re so small I’d never get them right. I’m glad to hear I don’t need to design for them.

It’s wild to me that someone who got rich selling songs to teens about fucking bitches, selling drugs and killing cops could keep a straight have (edit: face! Straight face!) while saying he’s offended about anything.

The vehicle. If the case goes dead you simply buy a vehicle, drive around until charged, then you can sell the vehicle or push it off a cliff or whatever