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Queen___Bee

@ Queen___Bee @lemmy.world

Posts
1
Comments
19
Joined
3 yr. ago

  • Why is kindness often viewed as a sign of naïveté?

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  • To add to what others have said, boundary-setting is a skill we develop over many social interactions. It may feel awkward or mean setting a boundary initially, but it's essential to maintain one's "social battery" and priorities/sanity.

    Speaking of priorities, those are a good indication as to when setting boundaries is helpful. For example, you have an important appointment to get to, but a family member/friend is asking your help with something at around the same time. Communicating you have a prior engagement at the time of your appointment while being willing to help out after, or giving them suggestion on how else they can get the help they need, is you setting a boundary of what you can do with your time.

    When we have concerns of feeling like an asshole, we want to consider from where that originates. Sometimes we've been raised around family members or "friends" who take advantage of another's kindness and treat people maintaining boundaries as the villain (e.g. "Why are you leaving us hanging?/ Why couldn't you help me/your Old Man out this one time?"). This is often a sign of emotional immaturity/ poor insight, empathy, and/or self-awareness. Healthy connections will respect your boundaries and maybe check in later if a raincheck is suggested. When interacting with people who don't respect "no" as a full sentence and answer, sometimes reminding them of our limits and empathizing with the person's situation can disarm them.

  • Why do the majority of women still take their partner's last name?

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  • Well, that took a turn. Sorry to hear that! I love how picking/making a new together is becoming slightly more common that in earlier decades.

  • Kindness in an LGBT bookstore

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  • Right?! Who is cutting onions, damnit. Another example of looking for the helpers, per Mr. Rogers.

  • Three-quarters of U.S. adults are now overweight or obese

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  • Tell me about it. The discipline it takes to not consume something the general public has been consuming as the norm is a struggle sometimes, but tasting the flavors I otherwise wouldn't notice from something not deathly sweetened is a plus. As well as better teeth. My parents also restricted sweet drinks to family trips and parties growing up, and I don't think I can thank them enough.

  • Masked group marches through Ohio neighborhood with swastika flags

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  • Yep, racists are going to be racist.

  • With all the bad stuff happening in the world like politics war racism homophobia etc. What is some good news that isI happening that we don't read or see about?

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  • Back when I was using reddit, I found Uplifting News to be a helpful source of positive information. Some of it can be reminders of our boring dystopia, like students helping another by starting a laundry program at the school, but it's something. Here is the lemmy version.

  • Plant Suggestions

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  • I saw it as an eyesore in contrast to the dark background. Plus, it just looked strange/random. No significant reason.

  • Plant Suggestions

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  • Bamboo sticks or a small trellis sounds smart. I'll keep in mind to give it a taste of the outdoors before permanently moving it out there if I do. Much appreciated!

  • Plant Suggestions

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  • Thanks for the feedback. The last time I repotted it was sometime early last year, and I don't know how frequent I should be doing that. Once the plant becomes twice as tall as the pot or taller?

    I didn't think about pruning being helpful for strengthening roots, so I'll give that a shot.

    So far the plant gets plenty of light. The window is north facing so it's more indirect light, but plenty of light gets through as far as I can tell. I tried moving it, but maybe I'm doing that wrong. Do I keep it in the moved position for several days, a couple weeks, or until I notice the branches aren't leaning as much and then move it again?

  • Gardening @lemmy.world
    Queen___Bee @lemmy.world

    Plant Suggestions

  • Emotional overload

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  • Regardless of the source's background, the information she mentioned actually reflects current knowledge of how infants and older children develop. In order to develop emotion regulation skills, healthy attachment, and social skills, we do naturally look away from our caregiver and others doting on us as a way to self-regulate intense feelings.

    In fact, many children can develop attachment and emotion regulation issues if caregivers aren't responsive and share compassion or empathize with a child's behavior (e.g. a baby becoming upset and crying if- when looking away- the caregiver instead tries to get its attention repeatedly and not giving the child a break.) That's why it's important to have some level of emotional intelligence to develop healthy attachments with kids and them with us.

    For more information, you can look up attachment theory and theories on human development (Erikson, Piaget, etc.). This is also mentioned here.

    Source: Therapist

  • Have you gone down any rabbit holes that gave you an existential crisis?

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  • Your last line about hiding reminds me of a peaceful species, the Nox, from Stargate SG-1, who had many abilities one of which was to become invisible and shield their community from detection. But funnily enough, they were so powerful and advanced they may has well have been treated like gods by anyone else.

  • Homemade tree for the BIG BOY

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  • I don't know about OP, but when I put rope on my cat-tree's soft-fabric column I just wound it around the column (cylinder, don't know if it would work as well on a squarer support) as tightly as I could and safety pinned the bottom end to the 2nd to last row. The tight coil encourages friction and prevents slippage when he scratches it. The rope hasn't moved, aside from when I rotate it for a fresher side, since I placed it over 2 years ago.

  • UN assembly approves resolution granting Palestine new rights and reviving its UN membership bid

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  • That definitely does make it clearer... On a side note, I can appreciate a Stranger in a Strange Land reference when I see one.

  • Who else wakes up and has to blow their nose or clear their airways every morning and why?

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  • Just for safety's sake, I would advise more for a diffuser with or without a light for aromatherapy. Lit candles unattended are notorious for fire-related accidents, and diffusers can act as a mini humidifier for some. But that's just imo.

  • Is "female" offensive?

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  • Moms are the best

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  • It's unfortunate that sometimes parents can't be there for their little ones because of their own issues, but it doesn't mean you aren't deserving of compassion (be it as a child or adult). As a therapist, I hope your week goes well and remember today is a new day for something good to happen.

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  • In your opinion, what's the age limit for Trick r Treating?

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  • Will the world ever stop being anti-intellectual?

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  • I'm reminded of an episode from Stargate when one of the Asgardians, Thor I believe, was able to stop replicators from attacking his home world with the help of one of the main Earth characters, Sam. Thor needed someone of a less evolved/"stupider" species to help with the problem after none of the Asgard scientists could find a way. He said with compliment, "It was your stupid idea," and Sam smiled back.

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