That’s perfect!

I picture them singing a lovely little song about beating the snot out of buddy for not paying the troll toll.

More like Nope-abinia.

Thanks, not sure why but that word was sounding weird in my head as I typed it.

My manwich!

Making random noises with my mouth is tight!

thinks the moon landing is fake

Everyone knows the government asked Stanley Kubrick to fake the landing, but he’s so dedicated to getting the most out of his actors that he build a real rocket and sent them to the moon.

Neither, I want to have my brain scan put into a robot and live forever. Or exchange body parts for robot replacements till I’m a robot ship of Theseus.

If you can beat 'em, join 'em!

When good homes go bad.

Do you have any nemesis? Nemesises? Nemesi?

Whatever, enemies? It’s much more satisfying to have your remains shot out of a cannon at someone you hate, than just all willy nilly like.

Elves just chilling in this hidden city.

Morgoth: “and I took that personally”.

Big park at it again!

It always amuses me when people comment on how cuddly, friendly, and playful my cats are. Turns out when you love, care, and more importantly play with a pet it shows reciprocal kindness.

I always wanted to play a traveling salesman who offers discount ressurections and speaking to people’s loved ones, but really is just a necromancer. Really sleeze it up, you know?

Edit: “Why are you an adventurer?”

looks behind themselves to a trail of pissed off villages

“For the new opportunities of course!”

Those crackers might be the body of Christ but the banana is the holy dong of Christ.

How is it good? I, personally, want a human to narrate a story to me. At the very least I would know somebody got paid to do this job.

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Tips fedora

M’property

If you like fiction (and Stephen King for that matter), you should read 11 22 63. Main character goes back in time to change past events and things… sort of work out. It has a cool take on time travel and course of events in general, I was a big fan of reading it.

There is also a mediocre tv adaption of it as well if you’re not into fiction, but I didn’t finish it.

Just make sure you don’t accidentally become your own grandparent.