Mr. Pickles the vase was found on the floor in pieces by the lady of the house.You were witnessed on the mantle shortly after the incident.What is your defense?
Meow?
That's convenient. It seems to be an odd coincidence indeed. And yet we have a long list of witnesses of your blatant disregard for elevated objects.I myself witnessed you dislodge a flower pot last week. Can you explain that as coincidence?
Mrow.
No. No you can't. With all these repeat offenses how are we supposed to judge you?
Meow.
Yes I see. That's right. You are indeed a cat. We don't judge you. You judge us.
The Baker says cake is good for 3-5 people.
Nutrition label goes servings: 8, 800(?) cal a slice.
You: fuck it. Birthday binge.
I've been there and learned.
Cut into servings. Take out 4 servings (2 people x 2 days) freeze the rest in slices so you can space it out.