InevitableSwing

InevitableSwing [none/use name] @hexbear.net 5d ago

With old-timey syrupy strings and a studio orchestra: 🎶 E'ry thing old is new again.

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InevitableSwing [none/use name] @hexbear.net 5d ago

Trump's running the US like one of his dogshit businesses.

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InevitableSwing [none/use name] @hexbear.net 5d ago

FT live updates summary

President Donald Trump said there would be “no deal” with Iran “except unconditional surrender”.
Brent crude settled 8.5 per cent higher on Friday, topping $92 a barrel and finishing at its highest level since September 2023. The price of US oil exceeded $90 a barrel, its highest level since the war began, up almost 36 per cent since last Friday’s close.
One Middle Eastern crude oil benchmark topped $100 a barrel as refiners compete for barrels. Goldman Sachs said oil could hit $150 if Strait of Hormuz flows remain impacted.
US equity markets closed more than 1 per cent lower as the oil rally stoked concerns about inflation.
Iran’s president said some countries have started “mediation efforts”. Egypt and China have both said they will attempt to mediate in the conflict.
Israel has been striking Hizbollah infrastructure in southern Beirut. Waves of US and Israeli strikes continued to pummel Iran.
Iran launched a new missile attack on Israel. Qatar thwarted a drone attack on the US’s largest base in the Middle East.
Air travel in and out of the Middle East is slowly returning after tens of thousands of flights were cancelled, with Etihad resuming flights.

An update

Goldman says oil could rise to $150 if Strait of Hormuz flows remain impacted
Oil could rise as high as $150 a barrel if shipping companies continue to avoid the Strait of Hormuz for the rest of the month, according to Goldman Sachs. In a note on Friday, the bank’s analysts said oil could climb to $100 “next week” and potentially “exceed the 2008 and 2022 peaks” if flows through the Strait of Hormuz, a global energy chokepoint, “were to remain depressed throughout March”.
Brent surged to almost $130 a barrel shortly after Russia’s full-scale invasion of Ukraine in 2022 and to almost $150 a barrel at the height of the financial crisis in 2008.

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InevitableSwing [none/use name] @hexbear.net 5d ago

NYT

The U.S. International Development Finance Corporation, a government agency that invests and lends billions each year to companies and projects overseas, announced that it will insure losses of up to $20 billion through a new plan to provide maritime insurance to ships operating in the Gulf region. The move is intended to keep oil, gas, jet fuel and fertilizer moving on tankers during the war with Iran. The conflict has disrupted maritime traffic through the Strait of Hormuz.

I actually starting chucking when I got to "$20 billion". Yeesh.

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InevitableSwing [none/use name] @hexbear.net 5d ago

NYT

A U.S. Central Command statement said Friday that the U.S. had carried out 3,000 airstrikes against Iran since operations began Saturday, up sharply from 2,000 strikes earlier this week. U.S. forces had also damaged or destroyed 43 Iranian naval vessels, the statement added, including ships and submarines. The day before, Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth had said more U.S. assets were being brought to bear for the joint Israeli-U.S. strikes, including fighter jets and Reaper drones.

InevitableSwing [none/use name] @hexbear.net 5d ago

Some Swedes did it to themselves. I did not make that up - https://hexbear.net/comment/6976129.

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InevitableSwing [none/use name] @hexbear.net 5d ago

The article ends with weirdness.

In 2018, a Swedish company, Biohax, installed approximately 4,000 microchips the size of a grain of rice [into people] that could be used to store emergency contact information, social media profiles or e-tickets. According to NPR, the procedure costs around $180. The company filed for bankruptcy in 2021.

--

Ninja edit

I googled and I found an NPR article from 2018.

Around the size of a grain of rice, the chips typically are inserted into the skin just above each user's thumb, using a syringe similar to that used for giving vaccinations. The procedure costs about $180. So many Swedes are lining up to get the microchips that the country's main chipping company says it can't keep up with the number of requests.
More than 4,000 Swedes have adopted the technology, with one company, Biohax International, dominating the market. The chipping firm was started five years ago by Jowan Osterlund, a former professional body piercer.
https://www.npr.org/2018/10/22/658808705/thousands-of-swedes-are-inserting-microchips-under-their-skin

InevitableSwing [none/use name] @hexbear.net 5d ago

July 1st, 2022.

It's at the bottom of the article.

InevitableSwing [none/use name] @hexbear.net 5d ago

Prince Hunter the Debauched

After the fall of the house of King Brandon the Feeble-minded - erenow where are the tales of the great prince?

InevitableSwing [none/use name] @hexbear.net 5d ago

Trump yells at an aide "Put in Trump wins in Iran by September in bullet points and print it out." The aide does so. Trump grabs the paper and after about 15 seconds he says "Knew it. I-knew-it I-knew-it I-knew-it. Almost as smart as me. So - very, very smart. I'm gonna replace everybody - the joint chiefs - everybody with AI. Don't need them." Nobody says anything because they can't judge Trump's tone. And when the Great Man is talking - you better not laugh at the wrong thing or at the wrong time.

He seems serious (maybe?) when he says "The first thing I'm gonna do is—" But he interrupts himself. "Me-me-me-me-me-me-me. I'm on Fox. Fix it." He means that for his ginormous tv - he wants the audio unmuted, multiple channels to go away, and make it all Fox. Trump watches Trump. Trump is all smiles and starts to give his aides play-by-play as if he's watching a recording of himself as the quarterback who won the Super Bowl basically all by himself.

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InevitableSwing [none/use name] @hexbear.net 5d ago

In an absurdist fantasy novel the wizard would be named Cramer. He's the highest ranking member of the court not of royal blood. His pronouncements are always deeply considered by the powerful. But all the common people know that you always should do the opposite of what he says.

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InevitableSwing [none/use name] @hexbear.net 5d ago

three card monte

Ah, the ol' physical media prediction market bet.

InevitableSwing [none/use name] @hexbear.net 5d ago

I imagine this happened...

"The war needs to over by September." says Trump and the room which has America's top military guys is leaders quiet. They all intently look at the enormous table they are at. "Over by September," Trump says again. One guy has a nervous tic and his hand goes up to adjust his collar which doesn't actually need adjusting. This causes a mild ripple effect of people slightly moving in their seats or slightly moving their upper bodies. Trump is already angry and he's about to say it a third time.

Just then an odd whirring mechanized sound can be heard. The ancient guy in the wheelchair who was in the shadows has started to move. Everyone turns their head to see. Taking this opportunity - one five star very quietly asks another a question. "Who's that old dinosaur? Christ. Look at 'im. He looks like the world's oldest man" And the reply is "He is - unofficially. Officially - he doesn't exist. He's an Operation Paperclip SS Nazi named Dr. Strangelove..."

InevitableSwing [none/use name] @hexbear.net 6d ago

/thread

InevitableSwing [none/use name] @hexbear.net 6d ago

Thanks.