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GooberEar

@ GooberEar @lemmy.wtf

Posts
0
Comments
398
Joined
1 yr. ago

  • Eggs Rule

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  • Eggs are so hard to find and so expensive where I live that we've started substituting wegovy for eggs in our recipes.

  • No need to use my full name

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  • My uncle's name is Sir Benjamin Theodore Jameson Preston Livingstone Senior the Third, but he was better known as One Ball by his family, social circle, neighborhood, and coworkers. He lost a testicle to an alligator attack when I was 12 and ever since then, that's what everyone calls him. Supposedly couldn't have children, but somehow he did end up with a daughter. Granted she had blonde hair and blue eyes, so who knows where that might've come from. Certainly didn't come from Jing Ho's family.

  • 6 March 2025

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  • Like my grammie always used to say, find a job doing something you love and you'll never work a day in your life.

  • Do tell!!!

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  • The secret to good tuna salad is to add something crunchy (celery, water chestnut, firm relish), something sweet (sweet relish, pinch of sugar), hard boiled egg yolk or diced whole hard boiled egg, and a small amount of breadcrumbs or crushed crackers to absorb excess moisture, with crackers being slightly tastier due to added sodium but breadcrumbs being preferred if you need to reduce sodium. You can also substitute canned salmon or similar for the tuna if mercury and pollutants are a cause for concern. And of course, a dollop of real mayonnaise, not artificially sweetened, hydrogenated and whipped vegetable byproduct.

  • Times are tough for everyone

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  • I mean, at the end of the day, candy is candy and three dollars is three dollars.

  • Unsubscribe

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  • If you just cut out a half dozen eggs per day from your budget, you'll be fine. And if that's not enough. then make coffee at home and stop ordering avocado toast, too. Did you know you can also sell your plasma for money and I think they even take gay people's blood now, too.

  • Now we have memes comrades

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  • I USED TO HAVE CARDBOARD NOW I HAVE KEYBOARDS.

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    Cooked

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  • Sir, this is Ruth's Chris.

  • Rent is due in 28 days

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  • Rent is due in 28 days and in 28 days rent is due. That means all you have to do is make a whole bunch of money between now and then, that way you can pay your rent. So the options are limited, but that doesn't mean there isn't any option at all for you. For instance, if you just had some rich parents, you could take out a small multi-million dollar loan from them and pay your rent out of that. If you have a nice body and you know how to work it, you could become a high end hooker like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman, and then it would only take a handful of dates per month to pay off all your bills. Barring those options, you could convince your friends to sell their plasma and donate the proceeds to you. But you'd have to have a lot of friends to make that work, and let's be honest. You don't seem like the type to have that many friends. On the other hand, we could try to make you a Go Fund Me and then send it viral. Had a friend whose hamster got leukemia and they paid for the chemo with a Go Fund Me.

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    We want grandkids!

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  • Let's see. Sunglasses indoors. I'm thinking he's either a druggie trying to hide his eyes to avoid detection or those glasses are an expensive fashion accessory and he's showing off. NOTE: These are not mutually exclusive. The drink, presumably an alcohol-based concoction such as a "martini" with ambiguous fruit which could be an olive, certainly doesn't clear up either of those possibilities. At best we see he's wearing cold temperature clothing, long sleeves and pants, and yet his foot is exposed, bare with no sock.

    What can we deduce from that? Maybe it's a prosthetic leg? If so, that could mean a couple of things. But foremost, we have to consider the possibility that his prosthetic leg is the result of an injury that also left him infertile?

    I had an uncle that lost a leg and one testicle in a fall off the top of a building. Doctors told him he would never have kids, but 10 years later that was proved to be a lie. My cousin Ricky was a miracle baby, even if he did look like my uncle's girlfriend's ex-boyfriend. I mean, blonde hair and blue eyes doesn't run in our family, and I know it doesn't run in Shelly's family either, so where did that come from? On the other hand, everybody in Ray's family, even the mixed kids, have blonde hair and blue eyes. So do the math and get back to me on that one.

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  • The real question is ketchup versus butter and we all know it.

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    Blinds

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  • Sansevieria? More like sans broke, brown people.

  • Just another wrong in a sea of wrongs

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  • I'm sittin' on the dock of the bay, wasting time.

  • Teddy sleeping in blankets.

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  • Is Pixelfed hosted on a Pentium II or did I just pick a really bad time to click the link?

  • Trump may put US into a recession, former adviser Anthony Scaramucci warns

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  • I'm just a dumb normie, but it looks pretty clear to me that this is the goal. And even if it's not purely the goal, it's certainly the completely expected and predicted outcome of this chaos.

  • Tim Walz says he may run for president in 2028 despite failure of Harris campaign

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  • He's got some things going for him. Male. Presumably heterosexual. Caucasian. Old (but perhaps not quite old enough). I say go for it.

  • What if I told you...

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  • Oh my my my, little pony.

  • Pizza Rolls

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  • Seems like you gotta have your phone on you at all times because everything requires an app. Gotta use an app to control my TV. Gotta use an app to talk to my grankids. Gotta have an app to run the freezer. App. App. App. What they need to do is start building the damned apps into the appliances, that way you can just push some buttons or tap a screen right on the device to control it.

  • To Make a Mr. Bean

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  • Mr. Bean: The In BEAN-Tween Years