Nothing a little fishing line can’t fix.

Or nun habits either, presumably. Even though they’re nearly functionally identical.

I can tell by the syntax that our reality simulation isn’t a Bethesda product. Well that and the lack of random at collision doesn’t regularly launch things across the sky.

So they decided that the best way to capture the attention of today’s youth is with clones of games made 30 or 40 years ago. Sure, you know what, good job White House, have a cookie. Everybody clap for how well they understand the children and teenagers of 2026.

How many different stimulants can you consume before all your blood sprays out through your pores?

Motherfucker must be getting altitude sickness from how high his petard has hosted him.

The idea is that Trump’s corruption is SO obvious that the GOP is afraid they’ll get whipped in the midterms. Trump is certainly attacking the election system hard enough to show he agrees on that part at least, if not the idea of being less greedy.

Actually that’s an illusion caused by the picture being a still frame and not a video. In actuality his Eldritch master is displeased with the inferior quality of his oppression, and is taking the cop into the sky. His demise will be slow and agonizing, but hey, that’s what happens when you sign a pact in blood but then don’t make your quotas.

They’re technically correct. The British never stopped calling the American Revolution a rebellion; the difference is completely subjective. That said, fuck the Confederates, those bitches lost, so the leftovers need to suck it up and move on.

Om nom nom chuckle fucks.

Oh hey, they upgraded it to Mystery Beef? Nice. Things are looking up

We always knew it was about racism and cruelty.

I’m so glad I’ll be dead by then. And with no kids to have to suffer through the even worse future to come.

Why do they have their own castle?

He’s never gonna stop dying on his voter fraud hill. At this point he’s needs to be institutionalized. Like in a hospital, with medication.

Are you sure?

It’s green with envy.

Where else are you gonna get your recommended daily allowance of Vitamin P while in space?