for the last 2 years or so I've been imagining what I would even do if I saw a second sun bursting in the sky above me. I keep thinking "why would I bother fleeing?" if the nuclear holocaust comes about, it might just be best to accept my fate and get vaporized by a Dongfeng rather than desperately try and hide under something like that would change anything, even if I somehow lived, just to live in a dead world where I'd likely just die of radiation poisoning slowly and painfully. It feels like the best option to just accept my fate and be baptized by hellfire, and spend my last moments in prayer rather than to be one of the living envying the dead

i can't get this thought out of my head. i don't think there is a proper answer to this