That's just kind of how therapy works. They can't fix other people or society for you. The only reason to go is if you need help managing your own shit.
I agree that therapy is dogshit for depression because my depression won't be fixed by anything internal, but what is therapy good for besides internal change?
Thanks. It's probably not worth digging up conversations, I've been avoiding people I know for a while now so I don't remember verbatim how those conversations played out. I just remember the parts where a friend is spiraling because everyone hates him for being a colonizer and I'm like "I didn't say I hated you or was mad at you or that you're a colonizer?? I'm white???" or the part where a friend is talking about how evil he is for two hours while I'm trying to get him to stop and I feel like dogshit because I thought if I told him he was hurting my feelings he'd just apologize and we'd move on.
But that's not useful information if I don't remember exactly what I said before it. I just remember what I was trying to say.
That's reassuring, thanks. I feel insane sometimes from the effect I have on people when I think I've said something normal. My therapist didn't ask for any examples and just convinced me I'm rude af because I'm autistic and was homeschooled, but cutting out the "rude" behaviors never helped. In fact, people started melting down when they learned I'd done that.
"You stopped doing that thing I had a meltdown over? Why are you still hung up on what a dick I was?" When they'd never told me they were a dick or that they were wrong. I thought if I apologized for something, I'm supposed to stop doing it.
I just feel like I'm not appropriate to be around people sometimes because I do the right thing and everyone still has some kind of nervous breakdown.
Twitter had a few weeks where the algorithm was so broken people were getting recommended gore videos. Just a description of the most common one set off my OCD trying to avoid it. It was always kind of a shit website and not worth having an episode over, so I just deleted my account.
Tumblr's nsfw ban also nuked a bunch of communities that aren't inherently nsfw, but have large factions that are. Think like the furry fandom. I just woke up one day and my tags didn't work and my favorite creators were gone. PLUS the wording included the phrase "female-presenting nipples", which just sounds wildly transphobic and has no definition so they can ban whoever they want. And they doubled down on it a week later. Immediately uninstalled, heard they've only gotten more overtly transphobic since.
I don't even remember when I stopped using Facebook. I don't like being stalked by every heterosexual mom I went to church with as a teenager, so I never used it long.
Thanks, I really appreciate the suggestion. Probably not necessary though as I'm actually on my third therapist. I've been trying to figure out what's wrong with me for a long time. 😓
Oh, same. I cook at home 99% of the time, but sometimes I get a bad week. Lots of overtime, visiting a sick relative every day, something to throw off my schedule.
Those weeks I'm bringing home fast food almost every day and I probably look like I've never even seen a kitchen before.
My neighbors and I never talk, and I can't tell if it's because they're antisocial, or they think I'm antisocial. I wake up at 5am for the gym, go to work, and get home at 6 or later, at which point I'm tired and go straight inside. By the time I even saw one of my neighbors, I'd lived there so long I felt weird suddenly introducing myself.
It's worse now that I've started walking the cat because when people are out and about, she gets tense so all my attention is on her, not making eye contact or small talk with anyone, so I look even more antisocial now.
When other people get really involved in their pet's enrichment, I think it's great. When I do it I think I'm a little weirdo who everyone ignores.
I just feel emotionally fragile. My friend who told me we were through changed his mind and apologized. I understand what he's going through because I've been there too, but I can't shake the feeling everyone's a step away from dropping me. He can apologize for shutting me down and explain how he actually meant it kindly, but I still feel like the most annoying person on the planet.
I have a D&D game with a new group coming up, as well as a queer matchmaking event. The thought of both are making me kind of sick. I've had multiple friendships end in a slow drama spiral. I read so much about conflict resolution and de-escalation and still, I say my piece and the other person starts ranting about how much they hate themselves and how they shouldn't be my friend.
I just keep missing how my friend group used to be. After the vaccine became available in the US, we all took a big trip together and it was one of the nicest memories of my life. We talked about doing more trips in the future. Now I don't know where I stand with any of them.
I'll probably suck it up but I'm tempted to cancel both events. I really want companionship but I can only imagine myself ruining people's self esteem.
Not to be a killjoy but they're such delicate creatures and people keep giving them to children while doing zero research about their needs. No wonder they keep dying weird deaths. 😭
Fun fact, that was never a "me vs other girls" meme. The artist is into a fetish called bimbofication. They drew a reverse bimbofication sequence as a joke and it broke containment.
I've lived in Tennessee all my life. It's completely stifling. Spent my whole life feeling like I'd been shoved in a tiny box with no air holes. But it's gorgeous out here, and I love the mountains, and if I leave, that means one other queer person feels a little more stifled. Why do homophobes get to keep the mountains, anyway? So I stayed.
Even I'm thinking about kissing this country goodbye. Goddamn.
Completely sad. Honestly crying all the time because I feel like I can't do anything. Everyone keeps telling me to connect with local orgs but all their initiatives are like... The equivalent of planting a tree to try to save the environment.
Playing by the rules is useless because my reps are evil. Breaking the rules is also pointless— let's say you murder a CEO responsible for millions of deaths, he's quickly replaced and the machine keeps churning and you martyred yourself for nothing.
I can't buy the "surviving is resistance" shit anymore because my survival is built on the suffering of others who were helpless to change things before me. Food picked by slaves and an apartment built on stolen land. I'm not the problem but I'm not the solution either, I'm just part of a hateful machine.
All threaten the oldest hierarchy of all: man over woman.
Pretty much this. I remember being a teenager and hearing the most basic watered-down gender theory and being really confused and upset. Even back then I knew it was because, for it to be true, it meant a lot of things I take for granted about society were actually totally irrelevant. Unfortunately some people don't ever have to confront their cognitive dissonance, they just use their money and power to enforce the status quo they're used to.
Jk Rowling is a second wave feminist and she’s big mad that people without vaginas can call themselves women and be in women’s spaces.
Unfortunately you could have the best neo-vagina money could buy and terfs would still find an excuse to exclude you. It's not truly about genitalia, it's about being trans.
Heaven. Or just the idea that some part of the consciousness outlives the body. I really hate that this is all I get, there's so much I'll never get to do just because my parents decided when I was too young to decide for myself.
That's just kind of how therapy works. They can't fix other people or society for you. The only reason to go is if you need help managing your own shit.
I agree that therapy is dogshit for depression because my depression won't be fixed by anything internal, but what is therapy good for besides internal change?