No it was not easy. Literally no step of the process was even remotely pointed in the same direction as easy. You observing me finally finish a task does not mean it was ever, is currently, or necessarily will be in the future, easy.

And if it is easy in the future? That’s my personal win, not your right to dismiss my past hard work that got me here.

  • SorryImLate@piefed.socialEnglish
    10·
    25 days ago

    It can be anything which includes a step my brain wants to avoid, even things I want to do.

    The thing I want to avoid is often linked to a negative emotion or anticipation of a negative experience (especially conflict or boredom), or a step that I think will be annoying and difficult, but it doesn’t have to be. I can’t always articulate why starting something feels like I have to scale a mountain but I know that anything I can’t start immediately just becomes harder as more time passes.

    Some recent examples include:

    • My brother has asked me to scan and send him a document. It’s been a week and I think of it every day but I still haven’t done it because the 1st step involves digging through a pile of papers that induce guilt because in 2.5 years I still haven’t sorted them out. So I think, “I can sort the papers at the same time”, and instead do nothing.
    • I haven’t checked my post in 3 weeks. The bigger the pile becomes, the harder it is to start. I’m sure it includes bills that are now overdue, so combination of boredom avoidance and shame.
    • I really want to start a dance class but need to organise a dog sitter for my puppy first (too young to stay alone for now). A dogsitter I can trust? So hard. I haven’t even tried.
    • ScoffingLizard@lemmy.dbzer0.comEnglish
      2·
      2 days ago

      I can’t even do things I love due to task paralysis. I want to walk dog, but I need a shower and can’t get up. I want to build an electrical device I have parts for, but worry about everything else so much I just can’t. I can’t do anything but sit.

      • SorryImLate@piefed.socialEnglish
        1·
        2 days ago

        I’m sorry, I know how horrible that feels.

        If I’m struggling to get up, it sometimes helps me to focus on a single body part e.g. my right hand, and just concentrate on moving my fingers, then the fingers of both hands, then my toes, my legs, then sit up, etc. I find moving the first finger is the hardest, each move after that is a little easier, until I’m standing up.

        Also, I regularly walk my dog without having showered or brushed my teeth. I pull yesterday’s clothes off the floor, dress, and go outside. If anyone tries talking to me I just smile (closed mouth) or nod, and move on. I’ve become pretty good at “bugger off and leave me alone” body language 🤭

        I hope you can get out of your head soon x