i'm gonna have to stand up aren't i

that was a really cup of coffee. and an even better bagel. i've only got, fuck, three bagels left? and those are good bagels too. and when those are done i'm gonna have to buy more since i bake about as well as i metaphor. fuck. none of those eventualities involves me staying on my ass if i want more bagel.

edit: just realized i can ask my wife for bagel

edit edit: just realized if i ask my wife for bagel she will eat the remaining bagels

edit edit edit: just texted my wife that i told y'all about her eating my beloved bagels yesterday (CAN Y'ALL BELIEVE IT SHE ATE MY BAGELS) i will win this battle even though the war is long lost

edit edit edit edit: i just got a phone call from my wife y'all. she was at the bagel shop EATING A GARLIC BAGEL. I have been outplayed.