Was there anything at all that helped?
Sounds frustratingly similar to something I've been dealing with.
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Spoken like someone who has never had to deal with those thoughts.
Nice baseless assumption fuckboy.
For those unfamiliar, those are anti-depressants and anti-anxiety meds. Mine.
I've already spouted my personal psychological issues across other comments. I'm so sorry that I didn't take the time to qualify my statement with an essay about my personal bullshit here.
I'm truly sorry about what you're going through. If you feel that way then you aren't getting the help you need. Notably, you also already have your clear reason not to end it. You should focus on that and work to build more reasons not to instead of getting pissy at an internet stranger for calling people out on glorification of suicide.
To put this as simple as fucking possible, in incredibly vague and simplistic terms (that are still true by personal fucking experience)
- Repeated self talk about how you don't want to be alive and the like isn't going to help you or anyone else who is having these feelings. It reinforces those thought patterns that you clearly already understand are not healthy.
- Being able to identify when you are having those disordered thoughts and doing your best to turn away from them helps reinforce against those patterns. It gets easier over time.
- Posting suicidal ideation content into the void of the internet does not ultimately help you or others with handling or moving past those feelings
There is value in knowing you're not alone in your feelings, and humor reaches farther than other means, sure. But the internet as a whole is clearly far past that point, and I'm getting increasingly more exhausted sitting by and watching this shit be normalized.
I've been living with ADHD my whole life (close to 35 years now). Depression (officially) for around 15. Anxiety for around a decade.
There's at least a five year span of my life that effectively isn't there. There's still a small voice in the back of my head afraid I'll either wake up one morning and be back there, or I'll come back to my senses and find that the past decade has been all delusion as my car is plummeting off the local bridge or into oncoming traffic lanes from what was a constant battle every day not to just fucking do it.
And I'm not talking about the relatively "normal" time sink from the covid lockdowns.
I have a mental list of various options for how I'd do it if it came to it, backed by actual fucking research. I did back then too, and was fucked up enough to not care anymore about the hurt to those around me or the potential pain to myself from doing it in a dumb as hell way like a traffic accident. Good way to end up still alive but crippled physically and financially for the rest of your life.
Anyway.
One of the hardest things to accept is that there is some logic and soundness to the dumbasses saying "have you just tried not being x?".
It's not that simple, true. People who don't have these issues will never understand, true. It will be some of the most unrewarding, soul draining shit you've ever attempted, and there's no shame if you can't get there yet or if you can't do it on your own.
But here's the worst part: they aren't entirely wrong.
You build your healthy coping mechanisms and your psychological toolkit to fight against this shit through constant neverending effort to work against the bad internal shit. The more you work against it, the stronger those tools get. Eventually, like repeated practice of martial arts or musical instruments over years, the things that took concious effort will begin to become unconcious. The equivalent of mental muscle memory, for lack of a phrase for it that doesn't sound silly.
You'll stumble. You'll fail. You'll have to start back over from what feels like (and may actually be) square one. But that work against it is ultimately the core of any way you're going to be able to keep moving forward.
It will never be as simple as "just don't be sad, lol", but some aspect of your journey out of it will have to come from personal effort to not be what you are today.
On top of all that?
This isn't even an actually funny joke about not wanting to exist anymore. "haha, I don't want to live anymore even though they do! Rofl lmao."
Boo! Get some better material.
I think a lot of people doing the funny haha suicidal ideation thing forget that it's entirely within their power to opt-out of life if they really mean it.
Edit: and the evidence that you're still here would happily indicate that you don't truly mean it. So could you all please just cut it out?
And yet another reminder of why industry standard for pretty much any software is to delay non-security patches for a set period of time.
It's just extra bullshit that Microsoft's QA department is so godawful. No excuse for a company their size to not have these patches thoroughly "dog food"ed before they even think about pushing them to the public.
Fair enough. What's stopping you Mr. Freedom Fighter?
It's funny you think you deserve even as much as I gave you when you put so much effort into talking down at the people who you think should be piling their own corpses in the street.
"hurr durr" are you fucking kidding me with that shit? Did I take a time warp back to being a teen in the mid 2000s? Should we start calling things retarded and gay again while we're at it?
And the two points I'm making are pretty damn direct. Maybe you should work on the education situation where you're at if you're having trouble keeping up.
The change to "Microsoft 365" has been the case for years now. I had hoped the context made it clear that this was regarding the claim they had changed the name to Copilot.
Edit: Since there's nothing that goes together quite like Linux enthusiasts and pedanticness, here's a correction-
Microsoft split off a subscription based version of their Office suite of programs a number of years ago, calling it Microsoft Office 365. They maintained more standard non-subscription versions for a few years alongside 365, while very clearly trying to push people to the subscription model.
After that, they stopped releasing new standard versions, leaving Microsoft Office 365 (the subscription) as the only option for ongoing support.
After that after that, they renamed Microsoft Office 365 to just Microsoft 365, although the Office branding/tagline/wording is still present in a number of places (just not on office.com itself, apparently).
One of the 365 license options allows for access to only the webapp versions of the suite instead of the native program versions. Apparently they offered a "Microsoft Office App" specifically for users on this license that would simply link to the webapp versions of the suite.
This "Microsoft Office App" that served as a link to the webapps is what has been renamed to Copilot whatever the fuck, not the suite of webapps and native programs themselves. That remains named Microsoft (Office) 365.
Microsoft's original and horribly misleading blog post that started this shit here.
I sure hope that's true, but I've seen more companies switch to lower cost licenses with restrictions like only being able to use the webapp than I have seen switch to LibreOffice.
As long as Microsoft keeps offering ways to easily disable the shit nobody asked for in corporare environments/deployments I'm afraid the stranglehold will persist.
I would have hoped the context made it clear that I'm talking about the claim they renamed it to Copilot.
Nothing "half right" about it, but thanks for the pedanticness I guess.
Edit: Since there's nothing that goes together quite like Linux enthusiasts and pedanticness, here's a correction-
Microsoft split off a subscription based version of their Office suite of programs a number of years ago, calling it Microsoft Office 365. They maintained more standard non-subscription versions for a few years alongside 365, while very clearly trying to push people to the subscription model.
After that, they stopped releasing new standard versions, leaving Microsoft Office 365 (the subscription) as the only option for ongoing support.
After that after that, they renamed Microsoft Office 365 to just Microsoft 365, although the Office branding/tagline/wording is still present in a number of places (just not on office.com itself, apparently).
One of the 365 license options allows for access to only the webapp versions of the suite instead of the native program versions. Apparently they offered a "Microsoft Office App" specifically for users on this license that would simply link to the webapp versions of the suite.
This "Microsoft Office App" that served as a link to the webapps is what has been renamed to Copilot whatever the fuck, not the suite of webapps and native programs themselves. That remains named Microsoft (Office) 365.
Microsoft's original and horribly misleading blog post that started this shit here.
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There have also been a rash recently of newly created accounts making 3-10 posts to comics comms and then bouncing (deleting the account or just not doing anything else).
There is such a thing as not tipping your hand early.
"Why isn't the whole of the UK on fire? Don't you see what's going on in Jaywick? Why do all you people suck so bad that you aren't setting everything on fire? Clearly the problem is you."
Hush now, people who actually have first hand experience with the country and populace are talking.
That was horrendously misleading clickbait.
The changed the name of some stupid as shit "app" that only exists to open links to the Office programs on the web as webapps, which was apparently called "Microsoft Office App". They did not change the name of Microsoft Office.
Simultaneously not as bad, but even dumber.
Edit: Since there's nothing that goes together quite like Linux enthusiasts and pedanticness, here's a correction-
Microsoft split off a subscription based version of their Office suite of programs a number of years ago, calling it Microsoft Office 365. They maintained more standard non-subscription versions for a few years alongside 365, while very clearly trying to push people to the subscription model.
After that, they stopped releasing new standard versions, leaving Microsoft Office 365 (the subscription) as the only option for ongoing support.
After that after that, they renamed Microsoft Office 365 to just Microsoft 365, although the Office branding/tagline/wording is still present in a number of places (just not on office.com itself, apparently).
One of the 365 license options allows for access to only the webapp versions of the suite instead of the native program versions. Apparently they offered a "Microsoft Office App" specifically for users on this license that would simply link to the webapp versions of the suite.
This "Microsoft Office App" that served as a link to the webapps is what has been renamed to Copilot whatever the fuck, not the suite of webapps and native programs themselves. That remains named Microsoft (Office) 365.
Microsoft's original and horribly misleading blog post that started this shit here.
For the desktop app that only opens links to the webapp versions of Office
They did not fucking rename Microsoft Office. It's dumb enough without everyone uncritically parroting the misleading clickbait.
Why in the fuck was there even a desktop app to just open the webapp links? That's dumb as shit! Why the fuck would anyone care about it enough to rename it? That's even dumber! Why would...
You get the picture.
The reality isn't as bad, while simultaneously being even more dumb.
Edit: Since there's nothing that goes together quite like Linux enthusiasts and pedanticness, here's a correction-
Microsoft split off a subscription based version of their Office suite of programs a number of years ago, calling it Microsoft Office 365. They maintained more standard non-subscription versions for a few years alongside 365, while very clearly trying to push people to the subscription model.
After that, they stopped releasing new standard versions, leaving Microsoft Office 365 (the subscription) as the only option for ongoing support.
After that after that, they renamed Microsoft Office 365 to just Microsoft 365, although the Office branding/tagline/wording is still present in a number of places (just not on office.com itself, apparently).
One of the 365 license options allows for access to only the webapp versions of the suite instead of the native program versions. Apparently they offered a "Microsoft Office App" specifically for users on this license that would simply link to the webapp versions of the suite.
This "Microsoft Office App" that served as a link to the webapps is what has been renamed to Copilot whatever the fuck, not the suite of webapps and native programs themselves. That remains named Microsoft (Office) 365.
Microsoft's original and horribly misleading blog post that started this shit here.
Last.fm is probably the closest thing functionality-wise to what you're looking for as far as reccomendations go.
You can "scrobble" or log what you've listened to or enjoyed from a metric ton of sources, and reccomendations are based off the user community and tagging. Covers popular to underground and everything in between.
Not sure what the whole "federated" part of this adds to anything.
Kind of a fun inversion of the Scott Pilgrim evil exes thing.
As an aside, does it make the whole thing any less weird and toxic because there's some small aspect of self awareness about the fact that the whole "fight and defeat my exes like I'm a prize to be won" thing is toxic?
I won't lie and say that I didn't enjoy the OG comic series as a nerdy college freshman, and I was shocked at how many people missed the underlying message of "all of these people fucking suck" even back then, but it's just so much worse every time I think back to it now that I'm older.
Doesn't have to be railroading for this sort of thing to occur. You can't out-plan effectively infinite options, and it's important to set a baseline of expectations not only of the DM but also of the players.
Shockingly, some players don't understand the basic "find a reason for your character to travel with the others" concept unless it's spelled out to them. There's also some players that will intentionally play as though they're allergic to main plot threads, which can be fine if that's established going in but a pain in the ass if there was an understanding that the DM might be able to prepare shit in advance and not always instantaneously adlib.
Like don't agree to Descent to Avernus if you don't have any intention of going to Avernus.
Sorry, I get you were probably joking, but I've also been in some groups that just didn't work out because players weren't straightforward about what they were looking for.
Initially connect when the target isn't home, as a number of speakers make a distinct "startup" noise when a device connects.
After that, bear in mind that most bluetooth speakers have a small delay before they play audio, and this often means that the first second or so of audio will be cut off. Unless you use another app to keep a constant silent noise playing. The silence being sent as audio to play effectively "warms up" the speaker so the cut off portion is during the silence, not the actual noise you want. Some speakers need this silence to be infintessimally quiet static, as they'll just drop pure silence. Pretty sure there's an app on F-Droid for this.
You wouldn't want your friend to only hear part of the chirp after all.
Also, most devices with a screen have a way to display the name of what device is connected. This especially applies to casting to screens. Name your phone something generic for safety.