I like the idea of a "least worst" answer. When you put it like this, I realize that I tried clinging to the idea that if you think hard enough about a topic, you can find the best answer. Unfortunetlyu that is now how the world works and a "least worst" answer is much more achievable.

I would recommend seeking a professional counselor for guidance as a path for both of you to have a way to communicate important ideas with one another yet still being able to be gentle in the delivery.

Counseling is a more difficult topic to bring up. We are on the older side of the Millennial generation, and we were raised in a time when counseling was associated with, to put it bluntly, madness. I recognize that it is wrong, and I have sought professional help in the past, and it did wonders for me. That being said, recently the topic of counseling came up in conversation on an unrelated situation, and she made it clear that she is not fond of the idea. If we find ourselves in a situation where we can't communicate healthily, I will propose couples counseling.