expanding a bit on "virgin" as a prejorative: the idea behind using it is an example of turning "a bullies words against them". its an easy way to upset the bully, sure. but consider: to use their insults is to in many ways agree with them.
calling a misogynist a "virgin" might sting em if they're young, but it also affirms to them (and anyone who hears) that sex is a form of male power.
yeah it sucks but can you imagine not hyper empathizing? i don't think I'd press if you put that button in front of me, even though it is often painful i get sick when i see a lack of empathy and thinking that could ever be me is disgusting
Is it normal to not feel equipped for adult life whatsoever?
yeah it is. so's feeling like you should already know what you wanna do and feeling like you're falling behind or that you are "already" 21.
let's see if my old ass can articulate this in a non trite way?
the best, most relaxing thing you can learn about those confident happy older people around you —and you will only believe me after a couple decades seeing it for yourself—
is that nearly all of us are flying by the seat of our pants, all of the time, every fucking day. it works.
we're faking it baby! like... all of us!
see that 60yo? bet ya a million bucks they were a 21 yo workin a crap job, getting along just doing what they can. stack a few days up like that? boom one morning they looked at the mirror n 40 years had passed lol.
it's really not any more complicated than that. i swear, youre not missing anything. youre right where you need to be.
i do remember that feeling, being 21... and vaguely i remember some old fart telling me some variation of this screed and i didn't believe them. but i get what they mean now.
story time! there was a person who roamed the streets with a big yella
JESUS SAVES
sign where i used to live. he's not that interesting but sometimes he'd cross paths with this other guy who'd roam the streets with a guitar strapped to his back chanting "Doors" lyrics (usually 'Love Her Madly).
anyway my man with the guitar loved seeing JESUS SAVES guy and would yell out "AT WALMART".
i would just be walking around sometimes and hear
"AT WALMART hahaha!"
from like a block away sometimes and think "aw yeh man's having a good day"... haha what a fun memory. mannn i wonder how those two are doin? do they still meet out there?
i can't believe all the weight i lost jogging. if i had known it worked so well for me (even better than swimming) of have bitten the bullet way sooner
eh i haven't been surprised by "dems" bloodthirst since i found myself here... learning to stop distinguishing them from Republicans at all was the easiest most provable lesson y'all taught me lol..
i will read this. i just had a terrible, endless fever-dream (literally, I'm sick) where i could feel my brainworms but wasunable to find and kill them.
watching these redditors jerkin at each other kinda gives me ptsd. i was inured when i waded thru reddit daily but the baseline animosity and smug ignorance drippin offa every comment's just too much to bear anymore
reminds me how lucky i am to have found this place at least
expanding a bit on "virgin" as a prejorative: the idea behind using it is an example of turning "a bullies words against them". its an easy way to upset the bully, sure. but consider: to use their insults is to in many ways agree with them.
calling a misogynist a "virgin" might sting em if they're young, but it also affirms to them (and anyone who hears) that sex is a form of male power.