oh the new IT Cable Adjustment Technician just arrived

it takes time to start appreciating imperfections instead of beauty

The service is free

break fast 🥣 move things 🛒

one might daydream but imagine bank holding ur family being homeless as a hostage -- to keep you alive & working ofc

it's just caffeine, state of the world has nothing to do with my crippling anxiety

much profits, just 5 people on team, imagine sweet sweet bonuses

Repeat after me "this problem isn't bothering me". There! fixed it

friendship ended with this hooman, gotta bite off his toes tonight

R u asleep, hooman

Limit of your love approaches cat equals me

Saved the kid but gave his own life in the end

Blow dryer was invented in 1920. People in 1919:

R u on call, Human? Let's go tussle

I am myself and myself is bad at fitting in

yay, no dunning kruger for me! hold up, oh no

mooom, did you get those crisps?

now u'll feel bad for laughing as well

exam morning: 3 dismissed alarms, 3 missed calls, 1 career down the drain

Got mobile casino with hot people working