Similar to me. 57 now, autism+alexithymia+aphantasia but only discovered all of this through self-directed research. Because I "look normal". Just a "bit weird". All of my issues & attempts to cope just seen as me being "moody", or "argumentative", or generally arseholish. Anyway, not looking to whine just agreeing with you - it's not easy and there's not really much practical support, even though the health services here (UK) claim otherwise.
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Have you tried this?
https://github.com/AlexAshs/musicbee-on-linux