I have starlink. I use a cheap VPS. Tailscale and Reverse proxy to selfhost. I have docker running nginx proxy manager on the VPS with a could other docker containers running on the VPS like a speedtest and a few other things because I can. The heavy things like nextcloud sit at home and via the reverse proxy points it over the tailscale tunnel to my main docker.
I don’t think so. But I haven’t tried. I use the Starlink as more of a cold failover for when my LTE/5G goes down. $40/mo vs $120/mo for same speeds and LTE/5G has better latency for me. I work (tech) from home and live rural.
With DNS-fu you could have two VPS! I saw a project somewhere for nginx proxy manager that clones the settings. Then your only failure point would be the local tailscale.