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UrsineApathy [any, comrade/them]

@ UrsineApathy @hexbear.net

Posts
0
Comments
41
Joined
2 yr. ago

  • Hey Chapo, I'm in a dark place (severe alcohol detox) what is the most positive and uplifting thing you can tell me, comrades? I need a whole lot of good vibes right now <3

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  • The first couple of days of sobriety were always so strange for me. I'd try to go to sleep (or more accurately stare at a fucking wall or tv for hours until I eventually succumbed to it) with an unfocused but overwhelming feeling of dread and anxiety, but the first few days waking up without being hungover were so awesome and energizing. I'd be tired as everloving shit because of the miserable sleep and chemical changes, but somehow still feel better and more capable than I did in years. That's all to say, I'm sorry I missed the boat to help you last night, but I hope you have an awesome fucking morning because you've earned it.

    There will be good days and bad days and the nature of the beast changes as the days turn to weeks turn to months but every day gets a little bit easier. I started drinking for somewhat similar reasons to you, but I don't want to assume I know your struggles so I won't say anything more. Even so, it might be hard to see when times get tough, but life is still better in every way without the drink. Stay strong friend.

  • complete noob cooking?

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  • anyone who finds it difficult probably has trouble eating and shitting

    Maybe don't put down and call someone genuinely asking for help a moron???

    I'm glad it's a skill that's come easy to you. Not everyone has had your experiences though and not everyone was taught the basics. Fuck off with that attitude when someone is just trying to better themself.

  • complete noob cooking?

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  • Cooking is easy man. Just follow the recipes.

    Cooking is NOT easy and most recipes are frankly bad or lazy and expect you to have a certain skill level. If you don't know enough already to know how to vet which ones are good then it's going to be difficult and overwhelming.

    I agree that breakfast items are a good starting place, but please don't try to downplay how much knowledge and work goes into making successful dish. That's just going to lead to frustration.

  • complete noob cooking?

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  • A lot of the difficulty in learning to cook is that you simply need to know the ingredients. You need to know how to prep it, how it changes as you cook it, and develop an intuition for when you need to adjust the recipe because very rarely are you ever going to follow a recipe word for word and a lot flat out lie about cooking times and expect you to have a basic level of knowledge already. It feels like a lot, because it IS a lot.

    My partner was in a similar situation when we first met. She hadn't eaten or heard of a lot of ingredients and got stressed out when I tried to watch or help. A big help for her was to use a meal service, like Blue Apron or Factor. They come with very accurate recipes and all the ingredients are partially prepared and portioned, so no shopping and you have everything you need. I know it doesn't help with the two week period you have, but when you're back home and if it's in your budget it could be something to look into that could really help.

    Just remember that learning anything is a process though. You're going to make some burnt or nasty food sometimes, but don't let it discourage you!

    Edit: I asked my partner if she would have liked to have done anything different knowing what she knows now and she still recommends using the meal service. She said that specifically a lot of recipes expected you to know what "small dicing an onion" or "mince two cloves of garlic" meant and was supposed to look like, but they included accurate pictures of what they looked like prepped and that it was very helpful to make sure you had everything right before you even started cooking while also working on your knife skills (which is equally as important for cooking and also having it not take an obnoxiously long time).

    She also mentioned that since you have roommates, you might be able to gift a week or two of free referral meals to each other to essentially get a month or two of free meals between all of you. It's been a few years though and I'm not sure exactly if that's changed over the years.

  • Top 50 Best Games to Buy and Never Play

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  • Yeah, I'm in the same boat. For every game that I actually own that's on the list I've at least played it enough to find out it's not quite for me or I got halfway through and put it down with the intention of coming back, which is just a bad habit for RPGs in general for me because I tend to burn myself out on them. I had to stop playing Witcher 3 halfway through because my brain hates me and I need to find and clear every map objective.

    The only actual exception is Dwarf Fortress and that's only because I have over 1500 hours in Rimworld and I know how much of a learning curve there's going to be when I start it. I've just never had the mental fortitude to devote the time to it yet.

  • How do you read. No seriously to the bookheads on Hexbear.

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  • I'm of a similar mind, which is why that specific phrasing caught my eye. I always have a deep yearning to just be better and it's felt like the only way I know how to reach towards that is to remove the things that seemed to be impeding me. But this also came with the drawback of feeling like I can't have anything at all, which is also just not a healthy mindset.

    I'd actually say I'm in a similar camp. I wouldn't describe myself as spiritual, but I also certainly wouldn't describe my main motivations for personal change as mostly material. My main goal was always to just be present and be at peace with myself. As someone who is (mostly) sober, my main impetus for that decision always was, as you say, that I wasn't comfortable with an external stimuli ruling over me. My motivations were always less material and more internal, however. I can't be reliably present, emotionally and physically, for myself, my loved ones, and my community if I'm always beholden to a substance.

    if you find that, I will be so happy for you, just don't give up if this takes a while

    This gave me a bit of a chuckle. I love and appreciate the sentiment, and this isn't the space to go into details, but my journey has already been a long one. I do thank you for helping to empower my spirit while going through the process though!

    I have a volunteer shift at the library tomorrow evening so I'll be sure to check if that book is in their catalog! It sounds interesting. I appreciate you sharing your experiences and wisdom and I appreciate you!

  • How do you read. No seriously to the bookheads on Hexbear.

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  • Honestly, thank you for this comment. I've been struggling similarly to OP for a long time and these are things I very much needed to hear.

    Not to become a monk or ascetic

    It's quite funny to me that you phrase this like this because I was talking to my partner, literally in tears, sometime last week about how I felt like I genuinely needed to live the life of an ascetic in order to be anywhere close to achieving and maintaining the goals I have to develop myself positively as a person. Like, I don't understand how my brain can do a task like reading, feel absolutely amazing afterwards, and then still feel like there's some insurmountable hurdle in doing the task again the next time still. It's genuinely baffling.

  • Ron Francis - Hope (2024)

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  • I noticed that too, but the shadows in this are what's really bothering me (ignoring the uncanny valley aspect I guess). The doorknob, woman, and pictures on the wall are all casting shadows from a point light source directly below the inside of the door just out of frame despite it being a very bright sunny day outside.

  • Hiroshi Senju - Beneath The Moon

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  • I love the composition of this. It's lovely.

  • It's comin' up, It's comin' up, It's comin' up, It's comin' up, It's comin' up, It's comin' up, It's comin' up, It's comin' up. It's...

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  • Holy crap. I've heard this song so many times in my life and I don't think I ever connected that that was the lyric (even though it's literally the song title and I guess I'm a dumbass)

  • Can someone who can read music notation explain what I'm looking at here?

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  • I looked at the piece you linked, but I can only see the first page, not sure if the notation you're referring to is beyond that page. Can you clarify a bit what you mean when you say "dotted capital I's?" Are you talking about the symbols that look like this 🎶 but with a dot next to them?

  • Questions from a new gym goer

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  • Realistically, none of this matters for like 99% of people and I've never been serious enough for it to actually matter for me either but it doesn't stop me from being a nerd about it.

    I appreciate the write! It's also something that probably won't be an impactful thing for myself either, but it's always good to keep these things in mind. Small adjustments can make a big difference sometimes. I'm more of an endurance athlete and distance runner and my system has mostly been that after 3-4 months when my main pair of trainers is a bit too worn I transition them to being general purpose low-impact athletic shoes until it's time to fully retire them. Shoes are expensive!

    I get that the flexibility on running shoes is definitely a detracting factor, but I guess in my mind that feels like a form issue rather than a shoe issue if that's truly causing problems. That could be ignorance and I fully admit that I don't lift super heavy though (like I'm not going over 1.5x bodyweight for anything generally and I've got a small physical build already).

  • Questions from a new gym goer

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  • I'm curious about this because I fall into this camp. My general purpose exercise shoes are a pair of Brooks running shoes, but I have high arches and running shoes are the most comfortable for me usually. I don't have any issues having a firmly planted and squared up squat form in them as far as I've noticed. I'm heading to leg day now though and I can pay a bit more attention though.

    I can see it being an issue if you're using a pair of New Balance or Sketchers walking shoes with those massive blocky heels, but running shoes should be lightweight, have good support, and be as low impact on your form as possible, no?

  • Cracker Barrel was always shit.

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  • It's a gimmicky chain restaurant in the US. They exist in the same general retail space as Applebee's, Chili's, and other similar places with a low to moderate price point and a theme. They specialize in mediocre southern US comfort foods and their main gimmick is that their waiting room is a massive side-of-the-highway gift shop.

  • men will literally daisy chain extension cords to a laser-powered hardlight bridge before going to therapy for thalassophobia

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  • I was watching someone's playthrough and I genuinely had to turn the stream off after like a dozen hours because I knew I had to play it. I mostly gave up on the survival/crafting genre because all the heavy hitters just didn't do much for me. I always play solo and they all quickly feel like they devolve into housekeeping and inventory management sims.

    The only one I ever really enjoyed was Subnautica, specifically because of some of the non-thematic reasons you mentioned for this game being so good. The survival aspects are actually really well done without making the game feel like a chore (it's so weird how effective adding a tiny little mini game to things just makes it feel less obnoxious), the setting and story is interesting and well crafted, and most of the tedious aspects of gameplay are given intended solutions in the crafting trees.

    The setting and storytelling is just so masterfully done that it always keeps you engaged. The combat is a little bit lame, but it's mostly because of AI being kind of dumb. I'm playing on a lower difficulty though so maybe that's the reason.

  • men will literally daisy chain extension cords to a laser-powered hardlight bridge before going to therapy for thalassophobia

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  • I am currently finishing up the manufacturing sector. I'm playing solo and I'm not excited for when I get to this part. It's not going to be a fun time with how low visibility underwater is in this game.

    As a side note, I very rarely buy games new or even like survival crafting style games, but holy crap this game is so good.

  • Removed Locked

    How do I accept that I'm trash?

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  • I wish I was okay. I wish I wasn't trash. How do I deal with the hand I've been dealt?

    Therapy. Stop posting online and call a behavioral health clinic TODAY and get yourself on the books for therapy appointment.

    I know this is the same poster from the other day and you've worked yourself into a deep deep cognitive hole. If sincere, this level of depression and incel-logic is way too engrained in your way of thinking and above the internets pay grade. Please, for the sake of your own future and everyone else in your life, talk to a fucking therapist.

  • We are in a recession (cw:alcohol)

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  • Man, when I was deep in the throes of alcoholism(semi-sober now) during the pandemic that was my go-to beer. I wouldn't say it was good, but New Belgium was the perfect intersection of high alcohol content, a decent price, and not tasting like it was malt trash. Last I checked they were like $(US)20 for a 12 pack near me though so I don't think it's still in that category.

    I disagree with it not tasting strong though. A single sip would make my hair stand on end hahaha.

  • Loving this new merch made by a reporter from Bari Weiss's "The Free Press"

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  • Even with your edit I'm still pretty convinced it's an AI gen that they then edited the shirt logo onto afterward, causing the weird rectangular color differences you noted. Look at the irregularly warped railing behind her and the inhumanly wide laugh-lines and joker smile the models has.

    Edit: looking at some other photos she has up, it also could just be extraordinarily heavy handed editing