Yes. Similar thoughts to other commenters. It was to the extent that I started considering myself ace due to my aversion and shame, it was something my body wanted to do so badly, but a part of my mind never wanted to go there. Start taking E, libido goes way down, and I'm excited because that conflict is finally gone. And if course now that the libido was gone my mind decides it wants to go there.
Still working through these thoughts, and have made massive progress (even have my libido back, it comes in waves). It feels nice to have a lot less shame and pain around it, and honestly I'm really lucky to have someone who's helped (and helping) me with that. I still get anxiety of having worked on it "in theory", but having things come back "in practice", but I think having a person I'm comfortable with and really trust mitigates (and would mitigate) that a lot.
every time i see something fire emblem related and especially three houses related i log back onto this site just to say something and then log out again no joke
Congrats on 5 years and thank you for posting your story. It's amazing to see how far you've come and how you've, despite the circumstances, grown into the woman you've always dreamed of. So again, congratulations!
Also I know these are definitely not the points, but I'm going to say them anyway:
One, I think this is written very well, and it was a good read in that respect as well.
Two, the art. I also really liked it, and I definitrly assosiate that character with you, I was like "It's Sery!". Additionaly, while it doesn't have to be yuri, it tickled that part of my brain.
For anyone else reading this: If you won't be triggered by it, please take the time to read what she wrote! I certainly found it interesting.
It could just be that the pride is a bad one, and I would believe that, it's lib central and the lack of real lasting community probably contributes to the issues with the event as well.
This is how I felt going to pride, like I wasn't actually apart of a group in certain ways, again. This tends to happen with me, but to experience that feeling via neurodivergence makes no sense. Why why why are they still doing things that so easily induce sensory overload? So many of us are autistic or otherwise neurodivergent. Why are we forcefully dragged to stalls, called at by corporate representatives as we walk by? Why does it feel like consumption is the only purpose. And this is responding to your other comment as well, but it all dissapears after it's done. The bit of a feeling of community just died. So many people including me need more than that more than just one day a year, and none of us have it. I'm very upset with how pride tends to go, and how quickly everything gets dropped, and how closed off everything in society continues to be for disabled people, even in other marginalized spaces.
Oh, and there were cops everywhere. Still going to go again next time, spending a day with people I care about is worth it to me (although I'm leaving around the time it officially starts)
Oh my gosh so happy for you!!!!!