Imagine being the first one to use a fresh porta potty. No smell, other than that blue chemical water down at the bottom. It's so damn clean.
"Great!" you exclaim with excitement. So you sit down on that smooth dry toilet seat and, relaxing, a tremendous donker just falls right out of you.
The mass is too great. The distance. The speed and acceleration. It isn't even a second of time, but you know. You know.
GaTHUNK
A cold blue kiss races towards the moon. A moon so relaxed the single crater yawns beckoningly wide. The kiss forms into a dull spear, racing towards the darkened maw. It enters beyond the shadow. Fully into the heavenly body. Cold meets heat.
You yelp in shock. There is cold artificially blue water deep in your butthole. The sudden tension passes and as your muscles relax again, some of that cold drains back down to earth. A light shower.
You were looking forward to this festival all year and you spend the entire time distractedly thinking in shame about how something so fortuitous turned to disaster in moments. You didn't bring a change of underwear. Why would you?
I had a sweet Brother for ten years at home. It was huge but reliable in every way that I needed. Finally shit the bed and my wife's work got her a Canon and it is just garbage.
Oh and my supervisor quit a month later, right after he got the end of year bonus. I don't blame him. Good dude. He helped a lot of the team secure other jobs in the industry within 3 months
That happened to me. I noticed a vague Monday morning meeting when I logged on. Checked with my team to see if they knew what it was about and no one knew. Supervisor was MIA on slack. Just before it starts we got a group text from him that essentially said, "what the fuck. I'm so sorry guys. I'm not allowed to speak or I'm immediately fired"
I checked the invite list and, sure enough... VP of department, VP of HR, my supervisor, and my small team. I instantly knew we were all fired.
Joined the meeting a few minutes early and it was just my teammates all wondering out loud what's going on. They're all pretty young. Couldn't help but blurt out, "nice knowing yall..."
Supervisor texts me with "please don't, we'll grab a drink right after this"
The cool executives log and blah blah blah your team is getting shuttered thanks bye.
Yeah but if you don't have brightwheel or seesaw or whatever the fuck, you won't be getting important notifications. They only only call when you're late for pickup or your kid shit so bad you have to take them home. Some of these are tied to billing as well. Don't want to use My School Bucks? No aftercare or cafeteria breakfast/lunch. Sack lunch only.
It's a huge pain but in many cases there's no way around it.
I'm aware the original subject matter of this post is different, but the walled garden apps that you have to use no matter what start as soon as they enter preschool
Imagine being the first one to use a fresh porta potty. No smell, other than that blue chemical water down at the bottom. It's so damn clean.
"Great!" you exclaim with excitement. So you sit down on that smooth dry toilet seat and, relaxing, a tremendous donker just falls right out of you.
The mass is too great. The distance. The speed and acceleration. It isn't even a second of time, but you know. You know.
GaTHUNK
A cold blue kiss races towards the moon. A moon so relaxed the single crater yawns beckoningly wide. The kiss forms into a dull spear, racing towards the darkened maw. It enters beyond the shadow. Fully into the heavenly body. Cold meets heat.
You yelp in shock. There is cold artificially blue water deep in your butthole. The sudden tension passes and as your muscles relax again, some of that cold drains back down to earth. A light shower.
You were looking forward to this festival all year and you spend the entire time distractedly thinking in shame about how something so fortuitous turned to disaster in moments. You didn't bring a change of underwear. Why would you?