It can be low effort, passive-aggressive, insulting or derogatory towards your convictions.
A few years ago I went to visit my mom around Christmas, I picked her up and we were heading over to my grandmas. On the way, while my 1 year old is screaming in the back seat, she asked if she could run into a store on the way.
When we got to my grandmas she gave me the bag that she had just bought, store logo on it and everything, no hiding a thing, that contained 1 roll of camouflage themed duct tape, and a pack of trash bags.
I had told her earlier in the year that I was using trash bags and duct tape to block the windows in my garage while I was doing some renovations in there, and so she got me trash bags and duct tape, almost a year later…
I still appreciate that she got me anything at all and there was at least a thought behind it even if I don’t understand that thought.
My dad won box tickets to the last 49er game at candlestick through some radio contest. All expenses paid, bunch of merch, got to meet some players, whole VIP package. Happened to be that the last game at the stadium was a few days after my birthday and a couple days before Christmas. I even happen to live in the area while he was flying out from Texas.
He got me a card with $20 in it and took his mom, stepdad, and ex wife with him to the game. Killed himself about 8 months later. Thanks pop.
Jesus I’m sorry.
I always win this question hands down; my really big asshole NPD of a MIL gave me her very used and threadbare bathrobe as a present. Made a big point of telling me it was hers and she was going to give it to the Catholic thrift shop she volunteered at but then thought it would be a gift for me. It was only fit for the garbage can and had holes in it.
But giving people random trash is a thing she likes to do because she likes to be provocative and “stick poking” in the therapy description. She gave her only grandchild an old vitamin bottle filled with dish soap and a bubble wand she found on the ground in the park. No spending one whole dollar on her only grandchild, oh no, let’s just give her some garbage. And for my BIL who golfed, she walked the public golf course every day and picked up discarded golf tees, chipped and stained and half broken, filled a sandwich bag with them, and that was his present.
She likes to pretend she’s very poor but she’s not, and giving her family literal garbage is her way of trying to provoke a fight because she likes nothing better than to provoke a fight. That’s the only Christmas present she wants is to upset people and make them angry at her.
I have a zillion other horrible stories of her, but you get the gist.
One of those fake electric smores fireplaces…. I have a real hearth
Cop gave me a speeding ticket for my birthday. I’m counting it as a present because he said, “Happy Birthday” when he gave it to me.
As a depressed 16 year old boy I received a self help book from my mother. I was offended. Never opened the book. Like in hindsight I guess she thought I needed help and the book would somehow do that, but all I saw was that my mother thought something was wrong with me.
My mom once gave me a cat litter scoop like this one
in my Christmas stocking. This was not, to my knowledge, in the context of a conversation about needing to clean up after the cat more often, but for all I know it was her way of subtly trying to get the point across.
My weird alcoholic grandma that my dad doesn’t really talk to got me a shaving kit when I was 10.
My aunt only ever knew one thing about me, that I grew up liking Harry Potter. First I got all the books, split across two years. Then I got all the movies as they came out, up to the 5th one. After that I was apparently too old for her to know what I liked, I got a gift card to a gas station for 3 years in a row. I mean hey $20 in gas wasn’t a totally awful thing as a late teenager, so I guess it could have been worse.
Most of you didn’t get me anything at all last year!
At least you got mine ;)
The address on my restraining order isn’t current. Get me your new address and I’ll get you.
Something. I’ll get you something.
You never came to collect it dude.
Missmatched socks.
Not just socks. Missmatched, ugly socks !
Life.
I knew my marriage didn’t have much left in it when for my birthday my wife gifted me a bag of candles that had been half eaten by the kids.
I feel bad for the kids, those candles must have been waxy and disappointing.
Nah! They’re used to dollar store candies, so I just tell them it’s a candy bar. They love the scented ones, a real treat.
At this time of year I imagine alot of peppermint and pumpkin spice flavors
my mother got me a desk light and then immediately stole it for her quilting because it was full spectrum white
I got it back years later when the thing holding it up had gotten so loose you needed to duct tape it
We had an optional secret santa in 5th grade, meaning no kid was forced to participate if they didn’t want to. It ran the month of December, you were supposed to give 1 gift a week. The first week I got nothing. The second week I got a single marble. The 3rd week I got a single pencil. The 4th and final week I got a tin of Royal Dansk Danish butter cookies. As a 5th grader, it was the biggest fucking letdown, especially when all the other kids were getting candy, toys, etc, every week.
