This isn’t exactly what you were asking for, but thought I would share a funny story from a few years ago.
I had a problem player, fell asleep during games, made other players uncomfortable with unwanted advances, would say racist things in and sometimes out of character, etc. So I decided to have a bit of fun on what I knew was going to be his last session with our group. He had wanted a ring of invisibility or a powerful magical crossbow. I gave him both.
The ring was not the kind you wear on a finger though, and he had to spend a full minute to put it on as it required some… prep, he was so imbarrest he never even tried to use it.
The Crossbow was hot pink, covered in glitter, and became soul bound as soon as he attuned to it which was as soon as he picked it up. It shot 4 Eldritch Blasts per attack action, and gave a free attack action every turn. It also compelled anyone within 100ft of the bow to refer to the wilder as Sparkle Bitch. Small price to pay, so he thought. Problem is, the Crossbow was a cursed item and after the wilder fired 20 shots, all the damage it dealt would be added up, multiplied by 10 and then dealt back to the wilder in an explosive cloud of pink glitter. I don’t recall the total, but was easily 4 times the players max HP. He was pissed, and that’s when I told him he was no longer welcome at my table.
More in line with your request though: A magical whistle, when you blow it, once per day you can summon an army of 1D6 chickens who will then follow you around until your next long rest. You can have the army attack dealing 1D4 damage multiplied by the number of chickens. The chickens are unkillable, and vanish in a cloud of feathers when you take your next long rest.
Fwiw, and I don’t know if it was intentional or not, it’s embarrassed and wielder, not imbarrest or wilder.
Rod of animal control: it only works on dogs and it only makes them follow you and perform basic actions like sit and give paw.
On closer inspection it’s just a chew treat
It will be eaten if the dog gets a hold of it
The dog gains control of the dog. I understand.
Wand of paralyzing. Just tell them that. Then, when they get to use it, they find out that the wand actually just paralyzes itself and just floats in the air doing nothing. DM got me good there just as I had to perform a spell on a guard. Had to aggressively improvise afterwards.
It’s just an immovable rod disguised as a wand
Crown of Good Buggy.
Crafted by a demented druid as a gift for a princess on her birthday. It was quickly regifted to a adventurer.
Once a day when the command word is spoken while worn on the head 10 bugs come quickly crawling out of the crown. Make a dex check -10 to see how many you catch (max 10) the rest skitter off.
Each bug lives a day and while alive can be eaten for 1hp healing and provides a full day of nutrition. The bugs taste of raspberry cream.
Might be worth crossposting to !rpg@ttrpg.network
Fart ring is a great but fun one
I tried to cross post it here: https://lemmy.world/post/22093917
Not sure if I did it correctly, though
We had one that was a jar of peanut butter you couldn’t give away or get rid of bc it’d teleport back immediately. It also gave a huge migraine and did damage if you ate it, and it refilled daily
We had a player who was obsessed with caltrops, and we gave him a magical object that let him turn any object that fit in his hand into a caltrop for 24 hrs. He could make like 50 caltrops a day. There were no real shenanigans to be had except he always turned money he was given into caltrops.
I’m envisioning someone just throwing around Lego bricks constantly.
A funny one i found on Reddit:
Glasses of hindsight: provide a passive perception of 20 of events suitably far in the past
Be careful with magic items, I let my guys buy a trident of fish command… In a desert. But it turns out lots of snakes etc have a swim speed…
Exploding Bag of Eidolon Dust : until the next sunrise, all your players exchange their character sheets clockwise, they have to play their party members character and class until then
Is this a body-swap thing, or just the players having to play different characters?
I didn’t think this much far, I just like interesting meta stuff, force players to play each other, add extra difficulty through not being used to their temporary “new class”
Not an item but I gave my players a talking pig with a Scottish accent. He was also a huge dick. I had stuff planned for it but they killed and ate it.
Yep, that tracks.
Ring of mirth - allows casting of Tasha’s hideous laughter 1/day, but afflicts user with Tasha’s hideous laughter whenever a 1 is rolled.
Vaguely influenced by Baldurs Gate 3.
In my last game one of my players got a seemingly dubious treasure - an apron. He later found out it was The Apron of Deliciousness (based on Delicious in Dungeon). He could make monsters and other seemingly non-food items into delicious meals. At one point while trapped in a cave he kept everyone alive with spiderweb soup. queue the horn sound
