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future_quadrillionaire@lemmy.world to Comic Strips@lemmy.world · 6 months ago

Toddler Lawyer

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Toddler Lawyer

lemmy.world

future_quadrillionaire@lemmy.world to Comic Strips@lemmy.world · 6 months ago
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  • sp3ctr4l@lemmy.zip
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    6 months ago

    Defense Councel:

    Objection, lacks foundation, irrelevant line of questions, this line of questioning will soon call for speculation.

    Judge: Sustained.

    Prosecutory Counsel: Why?

    Judge: Don’t make me hold you in contempt Mr. Toddler.

    • Klear@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      Why?

      • sp3ctr4l@lemmy.zip
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        6 months ago

        Bailiff, escort Mr. Toddler out, muzzle him if necessary.

  • IninewCrow@lemmy.ca
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    6 months ago

    Why?

    • Hupf@feddit.org
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      6 months ago

    • bach37strad @lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      Something something mitochondria

  • palordrolap@fedia.io
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    6 months ago

    “I don’t know”

    “why”

    “because it is not possible to know everything”

    “why”

    (infinite loop until toddler needs nap.)

    • skulblaka@sh.itjust.works
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      6 months ago

      “Look kid, you’ve pretty much reached philosophical bedrock here and you’re going to need better questions to get better answers. Now go the fuck to sleep.”

      • Entropywins@lemmy.world
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        6 months ago

        Why?

        • thebestaquaman@lemmy.world
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          6 months ago

          See answer N-1.

    • niktemadur@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      (infinite loop until toddler needs nap.)

      “The prosecution rests, Your Honor.”

    • Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      Pssshhhh, more like until I take a nap.

  • rockSlayer@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    I was this way, and then being an undiagnosed autistic 3yo plus 1 too many mild chastisings from my parents made me shy from talking for years. Engage them with a thought provoking flip of the question. “Why do you think food gives us energy?”

    • Entropywins@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      A quick thought-provoking because is all I got.

    • toynbee@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      I don’t think you’re allowed to do that in court, though.

  • RoquetteQueen@sh.itjust.works
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    6 months ago

    Somehow my children skipped this phase

    • fahfahfahfah@lemmy.billiam.net
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      6 months ago

      Yeah none of mine ever did this except MAYBE once or twice after toddlerhood, specifically to annoy me because they knew it was a thing

      • chemical_cutthroat@lemmy.world
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        6 months ago

        I was definitely this kid. My mom still teases me about it.

        • Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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          6 months ago

          Plot twist, you’re 36.

          • chemical_cutthroat@lemmy.world
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            6 months ago

            I’m 42…

            • Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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              6 months ago

              Yatzee!

            • SkunkWorkz@lemmy.world
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              6 months ago

              The answer to life the universe and everything

              • chemical_cutthroat@lemmy.world
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                6 months ago

                Yeah, I could tell you, but you won’t like what you hear.

    • Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      Why?

    • HatFullOfSky@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      My oldest never hit this, but the younger one who is currently 3 basically matches this comic exactly

    • someguy3@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      More entertainment up options now.

  • stupidcasey@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    Isn’t he so cute and itty-bitty in that over sized coat just makes you wanna prosecute whoever he says.

  • fox2263@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    I often think I should offer the services of my toddler out for terrorist interrogations.

  • CarrotsHaveEars@lemmy.ml
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    6 months ago

    Why what?

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